Back then, a lot of parents lost their children ignorantly. They didn't have access to the science and technology that you and I enjoy today, so they got married without checking for medical compatibility. I am not surprised if some of them accused the witches and wizards, including the bad uncle, of having a hand in the deaths of their children. All these things happened in the past. Surprisingly, even with the advent of science and technology, some people still blindly love each other and blindly get married, ignoring some important medical checks.
What prompted me to come up with this week's prompt topic in the Hive Naija community was a recent experience around this medical compatibility, and I was like, This should be an interesting topic capable of educating ourselves better. Now, let me tell you about it before I share my little cent regarding the subject.
Kizzy and Rita are my good friends and have been dating for years without remembering anything like genotype or rhesus factor. Their relationship has gone very far, involving both parents and their friends. They were already planning their traditional marriage and wedding; they even met a priest in our parish here in Lagos. Then the priest demanded their medical results before he could continue with the wedding process. That was when they realized that they should do the needful.
Unfortunately, the result came out negative. Rita created a scene in the hospital. Trying to kill herself. As if that wasn't enough, she ran to the highway and was ready to be crushed by a car before Kizzy ran to drag her away from the main road. She loved Kizzy so much, the same way Kizzy loved her. She rejected the result and headed to another hospital; still, the results were the same: they were both As, with an incompatible rhesus factor. Hmmm, it was difficult to let go at this stage of their relationship, and they started seeking professional advice.
According to Kizy, a doctor told them that one of them will take a 90-day injection to clear the As gene or so, and that should settle their medical issues. But then, who among them will agree to be injected for 90 days? This became another issue.
As good friends, we advised them to let go of the relationship because of the possible implications in the long run. I don't know how to explain better the kind of love that existed between these two, but it was so strong that they stayed in the relationship for another one year before finally facing and accepting reality. Now they are both married to a different spouse but still dating secretly. This is a story for another day because it's simply too much to download here.
The importance of checking for medical compatibility prior to getting deeper into relationships or getting married cannot be overstated. Personally, I had mine checked while in secondary school. My little kids, I have tested them and documented them. These are little things that don't cost much, and you will save yourself unnecessary drama in the future.
Love is good, but gone are the days where we love blindly, please. Ask important questions while dating, and have your medical records checked before trying to bring liabilities to this world. I have stayed with sickle cell patients, and I will tell you that the pain they go through is terrible. Their physical appearance, their strength—name it. You wouldn't overlook medical checks and have those children suffer, right? And also have your money wasted in the hospital from time to time with emotional trauma involved.
It's simple: love with your head. Do the right thing first and enjoy peace of mind, which is a luxury.
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Image one was generated with ideogram. Image two here