Gender roles in my family are just like you would imagine. As an only female child, the responsibility of cleaning, cooking and catering for my brothers have been obligation. Is it a position i have grown to like over the years? No. I love my siblings but performing task like cleaning, cooking and washing of clothes can get extremely overwhelming, especially when they're also capable of assisting with the chores.
My work as the assistant mother of the home kicked-off as soon as my younger sibling was birth; i became in-charge of making a bottle, diaper change and babysitting him. As he grew i helped with assignment, lullaby and cradle, feeding him on time and keeping him out of trouble- this was a task.
It was quite an herculean task because I was underage as at then: my mother did help but it was something i was expected to do by my relatives. When i turned 10, i had another sibling. The chores and task increased, i began to care for a toddler and a baby. Not as a mother rather a babysitter. It affected my school life because i was constantly counting down the hours i would use to take care of them and it became exhausting.
Growing older, i became more of an assistant mummy. I missed out on school events, because i had to babysit and my siblings depended on me to cook, help them with homework and separate their fights. I don't want to get started with the laundry chore every other weekend.
During my teenage age, this act grew into hatred. I didn't like the fact i missed out on so many events of my life because i had to take care of my brothers, and me. Men had it easy and i was horribly annoyed by it. At one point i wrote an angry note to my mother telling her, I needed the chores to be split equally and we had a roosters. It took a lot of speeches and convincing but i think my mother saw my struggle.
That was the beginning of an era of change in our home, we followed it judiciously and everyone was expected to do their parts. Although they were lapses at the beginning but we got passed it and everyone is happy now. In present times, i sleep in and wake up to a clean sink, a swept outdoors and a clean parlour. Although my work is still cut out of me, i feel better now that I've pushed for my brothers to be more involved in the chores.
My life is not on hold anymore and i can comfortably live the house without having a panic attack or overthinking if the house is tidy up and food is warmed. And that is it, this is how gender roles evolved in my family to involve both male and female, how about yours?
My name is Sherah Daniels and writing is my game.
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