Success is something we all want; we all work towards being tagged "the successful man/woman. But then, being successful comes with a lot of changes as well, and the truth is, we are not prepared for the changes that come with it. Status, personality, dressing, and a lot of things change. You can't expect a successful man or woman to keep dressing and talking the way she used to. That change in status would affect every other thing. With that, you should expect that to also affect the people around them... friends, families, and all.
There's this popular phrase in Nigeria that says, Love is sweet, but when money enters, love is sweeter.* That is the way it is too with one's relationship with people, just that it might become bitter as well. I could vividly remember two friends back then when I was in JSS1, still young. Then they were my seniors already in SS2; they were so close, always going everywhere together. I know them so well because then I do wait for them to pass by our house so I could follow them to hawk; they know the road and corners better than I do. Sola hawks pepper for his mother, while Tola hawks garri for his mother (not their real name), and I hawk kulikuli for mine. After some years, they went to a higher institution, graduated, and things began to change for Tola. He went abroad, came back, and then went again finally. I heard from them that Sola does reach out to me and that Tola rarely responds, and if he does, it's always that he's busy and such. That was how they both drifted apart.
This is one of the changes that comes with success. Friends who you've suffered together with, done childhood together, faced life together, and laughed together suddenly turn distant. We can call it pride, and we can also say it's due to circumstances. But then how does the person who's still left behind feel... Hurt.
There was one time like that; I didn't know how it happened, but this man in our street got a political appointment. I don't know him to be a big man; he's a very humble and funny person. Every evening he usually sits with his friends talking and jisting, they discuss various topics from politics to sports to unemployment and all. When he got this appointment, everyone was happy and proud, and as you would rightly guess, all of those jistings and sitting together stopped. He would drive past their usual stand and just wave at his friends and everyone. And as you would expect, people talked. "He don forget us, level dun change naw, na man he be he no be God..." But who knows, maybe he didn't forget anyone; maybe the expectations, workloads, and all that was on him were so heavy that he couldn't afford to continue such a simple or carefree life.
Also, success can be overwhelming; it can also change the way people treat you. You begin to gain recognition/popularity, people begin to respect you more, and such. Even though there are others who will envy you, some will want you to fail and fall, and what can we say...such is life. In your family, just know you are automatically the breadwinner, as they would expect you to always show up and come through for them.
To be honest, success can definitely make it seem as if we no longer see people we once knew. We may not really mean to look down on them, but then our newness, the new, rich, elegant, and luxurious lifestyle we are now living, can create the distance. We should know that now that we are successful, our thinking level will definitely be different, and the best attitude we can imbibe at a time like that is patience.
- Do successful people really change?
- Did that success now reveal who they were all along?
Both can be true, yeah. Success is more of a mirror revealing all that one has hidden before, which can be anything... pride, loyalty, envy, humility, love, and all.
In conclusion, I hope and believe I will be a success someday. But then, here's something for all of us...if we ever rise and become successful, let us make sure to rise together with a humble and patient attitude. Also, if we are ever the ones who are being left behind, we shouldn't be quick to judge; we should be patient too. We should know that life flips and tables do turn. Maybe when we get there, we will know better too.
All pictures are mine.
Thanks for taking your time to read through, kindly do well to stop by my blog for more amazing, educative and exclusive contents...