Around this time a year ago, Shanna ( ) posted a video on her YouTube Channel about the 26 things she learned at 26. That video inspired me to make a list for myself. I just turned 27 a few days ago, and I thought of sharing my list with you before my birth month ends.
Soooo, here they are!
Choosing my battles and protecting my peace. There is no need for me to explain or defend myself all the time. Sometimes, it's better to let others win or think that I was wrong, especially when I feel like the other party is not open to hearing me out. It doesn't mean that I am weak or defeated. I just learned which battles are worth the time and energy.
Quiet time is essential. It is important that I take a pause from time to time to reconnect with my inner self and God. It gives me time to appreciate what I have or have become, and assess what areas of my life I need to change or improve.
Be grateful. I learned to appreciate the little things more, such as a random message from a distant friend, laughing with my parents over a silly show or seeing my dogs hug while sleeping.
People come and go. Some people who I thought will forever be part of my life might eventually drift away. But not being part of each other's current life doesn't mean that the memories we shared was fake or nothing. It's just that some people became part of my life because they were supposed to be there at that moment. And no matter how long they stayed or how painful the drifting away was, they surely contributed to the kind of person I am now.
Every pain has a purpose. As cliche as it may sound, there is a bigger reason or purpose to everything that I go through. It might not make sense at the moment, but one day, I will eventually see God's reasons for my pain and sufferings.
Add value to others. I have several people around me who have been helpful in encouraging and inspiring me to better myself. I learn a lot from these people, and I aspire to also be that kind of person to others.
Be kind. Kindness doesn't cost a single centavo, so why not be be generous about it? A simple compliment or help that I give might be a small thing to me, but it could mean the world to others. Just as how other people make me so happy and feel blessed with their small yet sweet gestures.
I can't change or heal people. No matter what I do or how much I try, I can never change or heal people. Only them and God can do that. All I can do is be here for them to listen, understand, and remind them that they are not alone; that somebody loves and cares for them.
I should do what I love and love what I do. I am a believer of doing or dealing with things that make me happy. As much as possible, I evade things that don't spark joy in me. There are times though, when I really need to deal with matters that I don't necessarily adore. Instead of being mad or upset about it, I try my best to see the good in it and the reason behind it, and do it with love. I may not enjoy it as much, but at least I can say that I did my best.
Do it afraid. Oftentimes, I tend to tell myself that I will pursue something once I am no longer as scared. But the thing is, fear or nervousness will always be there. One of my mentors once told me, "Kabahan ka kapag hindi ka na kinakabahan," and that stayed with me ever since. If I will keep on waiting for the time when I feel fully confident and unafraid, I might not get anything done in the end. As they say, courage is not the absence of fear. It is doing something despite the fears.
No person is the same. We were raised differently and each of us has a different story and personality. I should always remind myself that what I know, think, or see may be different from others', and that is okay. I shouldn't compare myself or anyone to anybody.
Words are powerful. Words may not leave a physical scar in our skin, but it has the ability to injure someone so deeply, without even us knowing. At the same time, using these effectively could also make someone's day or avoid potential misunderstanding. I am a believer of the saying, "It's not about what you say but how you say it." I always have the option to choose kinder words or say things in a calm manner instead of lashing out on someone or blurt out judgments I haven't really thought about. Also, responsible usage of words is highly important, especially when I will post it on social media platforms because I might influence someone's perspective and decisions with my words. So I should always use words wisely.
Everyone has their own pace. Ever since, I really have the tendency to work or make things done fast. Since I grew up having this kind of pace, I used to expect others to work the same way. I used to get annoyed when the people I work with are kinda behind my schedule or don't do things in a way I expect. But as I worked with more people and I got more mature, I guess, I got to see how unique each person is. And that instead of getting upset about the delay, I should be more understanding or offer a helping hand. This goes with our emotions too. Some people move on from a heartbreak in just a couple of days or weeks, while some need years. Or when acquiring a new skill. Some can really get it super fast while others need more time. Instead of making others be my basis for my own progress, I learned to just look at myself and check where I am already.
Change is constant. I have always been a sucker for change. I like things to go as how I am used to, and I like being with people I am comfortable with. Change is something that I used to not welcome with open arms. But then, it is also something that will never go away. Change will always happen, no matter what I do. I need to live with that fact, and help myself cope with these changes, no matter how ugly or beautiful they may be.
It's a matter of perspective. They say, there is no such thing as good news or bad news. They are just simply, "news." Whether it is a bad or good one is up to a person's perspective. That is also why surrounding myself with positive energy is important, so that is also the kind of energy that will come out of me.
Be at least 1% better than yesterday. We always have these goals in our heads that we want to pursue or accomplish, but sometimes, I tend to skip the process and go run fast to the result. But that shouldn't how things work. Instead of pressuring myself to be 100% better than I am today, I should focus on my small improvements and wins. No matter how simple they may be, they will still surely contribute to who I would want to become.
Regret and what ifs are worse than failures. How many times have you shied away from opportunities or ideas just because you are afraid to fail? For me, countless times. My ideas always just stay on my head because the possibility of failing scares me. But then, not trying to do it in the first place is way worse than failing. When I fail, at least I got to experience it, right?
Love yourself. We cannot pour from an empty cup. For me to be able to love others fully, I should also shower that love to myself. Also, how people see me towards myself could also give them an idea on how to deal with me. If I don't love and respect myself, why would others do, right?
Focus on your growth. Most often than not, I find it harder to spend time or money on myself, especially when I don't see the positive effect of it instantly. Still, I should invest in myself and my growth now, which my future self will surely be thankful for.
Most negative criticisms are just voices in your head. Our biggest critic is ourselves. We keep on hearing negative feedback, but most of the times, these are just things we made up ourselves. Some people may say something negative about me, but at the end of the day, these people don't actually genuinely care. So whenever I hear these negative voices, I should just shhhhh them away.
Plan but be open to mishaps. I used to be very rigid with plans. Being ready and having goals is okay, but I should also be flexible enough to adjust to unexpected circumstamces. Life is unpredictable, and its surprises in not always pleasant. I should make myself ready with whatever life will offer me.
Admit your mistakes and apologize. It is so much easier to give a blind eye or blame others and the circumstances than admitting to myself when I make mistakes. And what's even harder is being that bigger person and actually ask for forgiveness when I've done something wrong, either intentional or unintentional. But we never know when our life will end. It is better to swallow my pride and be at peace than keeping up a good record with my conscience bugging me everyday.
Perfection is not real. Practice doesn't make perfect. It makes improvement and progress. We sometimes tend to beat ourselves up because of something that is actually just an illusion. So I should just enjoy life, live for the small things, and appeciate the crooks and stains along the way.
Declutter and keep only the essentials. I used to be such a big hoarder. I would keep every single object that holds a sentimental value to me. I keep items, photos, even people. lol. But as I grew older, I realized that unneccessary clutter would only occupy the room that should have been for something or someone better. As they say, quality over quantity. I should keep the ones that really adds value and joy in me.
Be genuine and honest. I believe that there is no substitute to the truth. And honestly, I am such a bad liar. I hate being lied to, so as much as possible, I try to be honest and genuine to others. Fake appreciation is far worse than an honest criticsm.
Success has no definite meaning. I often hear someone say, "I want to be successful one day." But what does success really mean? Growing up, I always saw success as having a house and car'; a high-paying job; and being able to travel the world. But that is not the case for everyone. Personally, my definition of success is being able to provide for my family while still being able to enjoy the things that I love. I want my parents to live comfortably with me and my doggy. Haha.
Okay, that was lenghty! Haha If you read up to the end, thank you sooo much!
How about you? What are some important lessons you've learned the past months/year?
Stay sane and safe!
Let's spread happiness.
herkeepsake
❤