Only One Flower Remains ..
On the sympathy Orchid we received from our friends when Pepper passed away. He passed on September 12th of this year. It's something that I (we) am still trying to sort out and work through. Each day is a little different as the healing continues. For several days in a row, I feel good, like I am making some real progress. Then all of a sudden something triggers an emotional downslide, and I begin to feel the sadness reenter my mind.
Knowing It Will Fall, Like The Others Before It Have, Hurts My Heart
For the last few days.. or so, I have found myself taking a few steps backwards. I've been thinking about our little boy and all of the fun we had with him around the holidays. I am not an expert at this healing thing, of this I am sure. I am probably doing the opposite of what the text books say, but I don't feel like reading any books about this stuff. I try not to think about things too much, but can not help it.
The night he died, what we went through as a family, and the severe hurt we felt that day, and the one after, and the one after that, and so on... Still lingers in my heart.
Everyday little reminders.. of him and the loss of him, trigger the emotions. Today I noticed that we are down to one final flower on his sympathy Orchid. Just a week ago there were a half dozen healthy looking flowers, then all of a sudden they are falling off like mad. The one that remains will most likely fall by tomorrow. It's all a reminder of how fast Pepper went from healthy (or so we thought) to not well and finally passing on.
Life is strange.. I've heard this said from time to time. I believe it is a true statement, especially when I realize that I have become emotionally attached to an Orchid. I suppose it makes sense, the correlation I've made between the plant, its flowers, and Pepper. Is it healthy? I don't know, but if you read the books, please let me know (haha). I guess in some way, my focus on the plant rather than on Pepper not being here, is helpful. I'm not so sure why it hurts so much to see that last flower wilting away then.
I have to stay focused, and remember that more blooms will come someday. Someday I will feel this loss less than today. Someday will come, just not today.
“Everyone says love hurts, but that is not true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Envy hurts. Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again. Love is the only thing in this world that does not hurt.”
― Meša Selimović
Thank you for swinging by my blog and checking out the post. Have a great day!
All words, pictures and art pieces are the sole property of B D Miller Gallery, unless otherwise noted and credited, and are not to be reproduced or copied without the prior written consent of B D Miller Gallery.
About Me ~ The Artist
My art work incorporates a wide variety of subject matter, including landscape, seascape, cityscape, and still life images. My works are the product of a continuing process of exploration through which I seek to portray personal and visionary interpretations of my surroundings. My paintings are impressions of places and events from everyday life, an interpretation of my imagination, and personal responses to what I see and feel on a daily basis. More recently I have invested generous amounts of time into my landscape painting. I am surrounded by natural and man made beauty, which inherently presents itself in the tri-state area, and almost demands that I paint it.
Not everything is art. Art is not everything, but it comes close. Art is everywhere and all the time. Art makes you experience the beauty of the world, the people in it, and the places we call home. Art itself is so influential that it can tell stories, show feelings, and express passion or fury. Art exists in addition to language; expression of sensations and thoughts, revealing a way of thinking too subtle and delicate for words.
For me art requires love, honesty and perseverance. In return, it reveals some personal, non-analyzable, and creative untamed passion. For the public, art with its magnificent beauty, improves mood and health and builds better human beings and communities. It engages the intellect, softens the heart, strengthens the soul and frees the spirit.
If Your Interested In Purchasing Any Of My Work:
They can be found for sale on
Saatchi Art
Or
Etsy
If you don't see the piece in either shop, It may still be drying. Let me know and I can upload it as soon as possible to be available. Or you can always make me an offer (in HBD, Hive or any other crypto) in the comments section of this post. If we agree on a price, I will then ship the painting to you. (shipping costs will be determined by your location).
