Kidding. It wasn't exactly a dining experience since we had our dinner at home. But I wasn't kidding with the "not-so-fine" part. Here's why...
Do you remember that part of Eminem's rap in the song "Love the Way You Lie" saying
Next time? There won't be no next time
Well, it's a double negative. But you get the point.
That's what we said to ourselves after setting foot out of the restaurant. I don't usually write any bad reviews anywhere but I figured people (especially Cebuanos) deserve an honest-to-goodness review about this place — Woods Smokehouse
When you first look at its signage, it has this minimalistic rustic design that somehow looks fancy. So, we never considered this place assuming it's too expensive.
And we weren't wrong.
But first, Woods Smokehouse is located just by the road in Barangay Maaslom, Lower Busay, Cebu City, Philippines. It's the restaurant right after Sampaloque if you're from the city proper.
What made me want to go there was this photo. Beautiful, isn't it?
Source: Facebook Page
It didn't seem to look much from the road but I was surprised that they had both an upper and lower ground floor with front row seats to the city lights. And of course, as a sucker to the panoramic city-light-view, we had to go there!
See the beautiful view we got to enjoy from our seats! The camera on our phones didn't do much justice with the actual view we had.
At first, we went straight to their counter to order but were told that a waitress will come and accommodate us instead.
We waited for 30 minutes to be noticed. And they were only 3 tables of customers at that time.
They had slow service. So, I took pictures for a while...
As for the menu, there was no meal priced less than Php 290. But it's completely understandable since it's a smokehouse. Steaks are their specialty. And they are expected to be expensive.
Since we already had our meal, we chose their signature Bitter Woods Cake and hot chocolate or hot 'tablea' drink. They DID NOT have coffee, which was what I was looking forward to for the night. Coffee, breeze, and city lights, you know?
So, the order came pretty quickly.
The Bitter Woods Cake was delicious in its first few bites. After that, it became too sweet. It was probably a mistake to have ordered their hot chocolate since it was excessively thick and sweet for a cup. We almost ordered an extra mug of hot water just to neutralize the drink.
I tried to ask for "service water" or free tap water to wash out the sweetness but they only had bottled water worth Php 60. I wished I brought my tumbler!!
Still, we paid good money for everything so we ate it all up.
After all that bad service and overpriced food, we had to pay an extra Php 25 for their service fee (even though it plainly stated in their cheap-looking menu that it's only applicable to purchases above Php 500). The nerve.
It's such a shame that this cozy, rustic place in Busay had terrible service. I mean, they had really good amenities, especially on the lower ground floor.
If you have read the blog up to this point or just skimmed through to this part, here's the summary:
❌ Extremely slow service (30-minute waiting time to get an order)
❌ Overpriced food
❌ Other food on the menu is not available
❌ Desserts and drinks are extremely sweet
❌ Additional charge for service fee
❌ No 'service water'
Terribly sorry for sharing something like this but it was not much of a good experience for us. If you happen to visit there yourself, I sure hope you don't experience the same thing.