Hello Everyone!
A chilly day, Engagement helps, More aimless hiking & Finding a path ahead in life!
Alright, I am running about an hour and three minutes behind schedule with my writing routine... but I did however sit down to begin things on time. Bear with me because I will assuredly spell out why that is the case in a bit... but for now suffice it to say that I got distracted looking at land.
I once again had a heck of a time falling asleep last night... but eventually I managed to drift off... and although my dreams were rather bizarre they were not super stressful or anything. It was perhaps not the deepest rest... but it sure was better than plenty of the nights that I have had recently... and I even wound up sleeping in for a few hours after sunrise to boot.
Anyways, this morning I did not quite have the energy to get outdoors immediately like I was thinking of doing... but I did manage to do my Hive engagement routine. It is worth noting that I am glad that I made that a habit... because much of the commentary has assuredly been buoying my morale... which was already suffering long before the recent challenges that I have been facing.
Eventually I managed to get bundled up in some warm clothes and get outside... but once again all that I accomplished was doing my routine chores. I did briefly tinker with the idea of stuffing more items into the trash (to be hauled away) but then I realized that tomorrow is a holiday... and the trash pickup would not be running.
Honestly, that one small realization was all that it took to deter me from working on packing things down... or doing anything else for that matter! What I wound up doing instead was aimlessly hiking around... much like I have done on several occasions recently in an effort to clear my mind.
I am unsure exactly when I got into the habit of doing that when I get overly stressed... but I am absolutely glad that it became one of my coping mechanisms. Lately it seems to be just about the only thing that 'does the trick' (besides napping) and I think that the lack of a destination (or even a direction) seems to make the walks even more effective in that regard.
During today's hiking (I went several times so I do not know on which hike that it was) I wound up hiking near that abandoned railroad... and kept trying to picture myself 'squatting' there (like I have mentioned before) as one of my contingency plans in case I became homeless. Not to get too lost on that subject... but whoa am I glad that I did not do it given how rugged the terrain is... and just how messed up of a situation it would have put me in.
At some point very late in the day I got a message from an old buddy of mine... and I gotta admit I was (and still am) rather floored by the offer that they made me. It is also why I was running late on my start time for writing and was instead looking at inexpensive land.
My brain is still sort of 'zinging' from all the possibilities that the offer presents in regards to changing my life... and especially so in regards to my long-term (and short-term) housing scenario. I do not want to spell too much of it out here... but in short 'a way out of my current scenario' has presented itself... and I am just going to run with it.
Although I will be moving back to the mountains again (which is not something I was wanting to do) the offer is just too good to pass on... given that the land itself will more or less be in my own name via a trust. I also will not be in another caretaking position with it... so that in and of itself is rather exciting considering how burned out that I am at this point with doing that particular role.
None of it is going to be super 'over planned' or anything... and the entire affair of moving several states away, getting the land, developing it and all that jazz will be a rather 'rapid fire' experience. Generally speaking, I try not to rush into anything (unless I am forced to) and enjoy being meticulous with planning and such... but this time I just have to roll with it all and see what unfolds.
Of course it will be difficult at first (as things get setup) but by the end of it I should have a large insulated building to live in if the land will accommodate one, grid power, clean water, a septic system, high speed internet and wait for it... a fucking washing machine and dryer! I swear that the real clincher for me is the idea of not having to hand wash all my laundry... and everything else is merely fluff!
Not to 'put the cart before the horse' or anything... but it is really hard not to burst into some manic (and caffeine) fueled frenzy to pack everything down here as rapidly as I can... just to end this sad fucking saga. I am still undecided on whether I will begin a new daily series once I move... or if I will continue this one. That said though I will assuredly keep documenting my journey one way or another... and of course keep working on this series for the remainder of my time at my current location.
Well, on that note... I need to wrap this entry up and go back to looking at cheap land in unrestricted rural areas! I hope that everyone is doing well and thanks for the well wishes because apparently they worked. Ta ta for now.
