Sherlock Holmes was a dopamine junky

_{testing, testing, purple pastures, gobs of glory, mic check, test...}

Howdy, Hiya, and Hello, Comedy Club customers!

I haven't been doing much of this lately, because I've been too busy with my videos, but I figured something out today that I just had to share, and this seemed like the best place to share it.

You guys (and of course, I mean guys of any gender) know that I'm a bit of a conspiracy theorist, don't you? Not like a Q-Anon conspiracy theorist, but the kind who thinks that Q-Anon is a conspiracy to derail conspiracy theories. Well, I am, and I think I just figured out a jackpot of a theory!

Does everybody here know that guy, Hive account@kgakakillerg? You've probably seen his spam comments here and there about how he's being mistreated, and clearly isn't a spammer, but merely a poor content creator with a dream, a dream of being paid to post the same thing over and over again ad nauseam, and be rewarded for it. This dream has been shattered by an evil team of whales, and anyone who agrees with them (which is everybody, more or less), using their filthy downvotes. He's now been silenced, and he must remind of this loudly, over and over again.

For a while now, I've been trying to figure out what makes this guy tick. He's obviously making his 'problem' even worse with his own behavior, which is antithetical to what he claims his behavior actually is. Is he just insane? A troll? A bot? Failed AI?

No my friends, I think the truth is much worse, and funnier than that.

He's one of the whales.

That's right folks, I think he's a plant. Controlled opposition. A false flag. One might even say... a spy.

Think about it.

What better way to PROVE to the world that Hive is a truly free platform, than to have somebody constantly spam the same shit-posting comment COMPLAINING about that platform! He's the perfect advertisement for just how free and open this platform is!

This explains the irrational behavior. It explains the cartoonish personality. It explains the bot-like redundancy. It explains why he won't just leave.

You don't know how good it makes me feel to finally solve this mystery. This was a WAY bigger dopamine hit than solving my first Chinese finger cuffs. I'm so high on this win right now, I finally understand that Sherlock Holmes was never addicted to opium. Opium was just his way of chasing the dragon when he couldn't get his real high from solving the mystery.

Of course, knowing the truth brings its own anxiety. Sure, it seems like a harmless game now, but I can guarantee you, when people start to propose that we SHOULD have some censorship on Hive, they will start out by using Hive account@kgakakillerg as an example of why it's needed.

Am I wrong? Probably, but in this moment, I think it makes more sense than any other explanation I've heard or imagined.

Isn't that what makes conspiracy theories so attractive?

_{Thanks for reading, everyone! As always, this is not a contest entry, or any other kind of attempt to win anything other than your eyeballs.}