Loneliness is something most people try to avoid. But feeling lonely is an inevitable part of life. It happens to everyone at some time or another.
You can feel lonely when you are physically alone. But you can also feel alone even when you are surrounded by people.
Here are some actions you can take to help provide power for overcoming loneliness.
1. Identify the Source
Some scientists believe loneliness is a basic emotion on a par with fear and anger. For millions of years, survival relied on being part of a group; being alone was risky. But now, a fear of loneliness can keep us in toxic relationships, unfulfilling jobs, and bad marriages. Identify what’s behind your fear of loneliness, and you can start to work on it.
2. Seek Understanding
Loneliness comes in different types. It can be temporary, situational loneliness where you find yourself without company or help. Or you can be going through a life crisis that results in more extended social isolation. A relationship breakdown, losing your job, or being seriously ill can all make you feel completely cut off from love and support.
3. Be Grateful for Solitude
Solitude is quite a different state from loneliness. Artists, philosophers, and writers over the centuries have sought solitude to think deeply and widely and to create their work. Solitude can be a comfort in an overcrowded life. Take advantage of those times when you are alone. You have the opportunity for mediation and prayer; deep reflection on your life goals and values; dreaming and planning your future.
4. Name Your Fears
Loneliness can be a product of the fundamental fear of separation that goes back to infancy. Separation means being vulnerable, having no one to rely on except yourself. What are your deepest fears about being lonely? To name something is to have authority over it. Name your fears, acknowledge them, and gain power over them.
5. Reconnect and Replace
Techniques like yoga, tai chi, and meditation can help you reconnect with your deepest self. Sitting alone in meditation separates you from the negative thought spirals and feelings that can make you feel so miserable. A loving-kindness meditation can help you replace feelings of separation with feelings of love and connection.
NOTE:
If, after taking some action, your loneliness doesn’t seem to improve, or if it is persistent and leaves you feeling hopeless, seek the help of a qualified therapist.
This is Part 3 of a series on Loneliness. You can find the previous two articles at:
Loneliness Part 1: 7 Types
Loneliness Part 2: Deterring Depression
Sources
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