I watched the trailer a couple of weeks ago and added this movie to my watchlist. The movie Survive is an apocalyptic movie, where a storm or some geological event causes the oceans to shift onto land. And right in the middle is a family on a boat trip somewhere in the ocean. Now, after watching 20 minutes of the movie, I understood that it's not the family, but we, the audience, have to survive the movie.
SPOILERS: YOU KNOW HOW SOME MOVIES ARE SO BAD THAT THEY ARE ACTUALLY GOOD AND ENTERTAINING...THIS IS NOT ONE OF THOSE. SURVIVE, THE WORLD HAS GONE SIDESWAYS, BUT WE ARE STUCK WITH THESE 4 DUMBASSES
Let's get into it.
Now, the premise of the movie is really great. Perfect for setting a disaster movie. The Earth's pole reverses, causing massive storms and shifting the entire ocean to land. I am sure that to how much extent the magnetic fields affect the ocean's position, but in this movie, the entire ocean packs up and moves to land. And my brain was like, wait, so the magnetic pole reversal can cause topographical change. And when I asked my wife this doubt, the response was “Movie Dekho, Saadi hui movie laga kar mera dimaag kharaab kar rahe ho.” [English Translation - Just watch the stupid movie, you and the movie are causing me headaches] paired with angry stares.
Anyway, so the Ocean shifts and the boat ends up in MadMax style desert? I mean, it's not even hours after the shift. Like, there was a fish flopping on the boat, which means it's a matter of mins, then how come the ocean floor turned into a desert? I paused the movie and turned to my wife again. And she replied without me asking, “Yaar, aise phir hogaya humara. Mujhe khana bhi banana hain.” [English Translation - At this pace, it would never end. I have to cook too.]
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And after some unbearable acting and family crying, we were introduced to the Psycho. A guy who is walking around on the ocean floor, now a desert, along with his dog. My best guess would be that he was probably on another boat, which happened to survive the ocean shift. And all that turned him into a murderous psycho. Or maybe he was just an audience member who got fed up and teleported himself into the movie so that he can end it all. Like the daughter who was on headphones the first time her mother was drifting away was calling for help and second time was on headphones when her family got attacked by the psycho.
This movie has an interesting idea, but fails spectacularly to follow up on it. From the acting to the dialogue to the plot itself, it failed. The characters were shown as dumb people. So much so that I was secretly hoping for the psycho to catch up with them and give them and movie the ending it deserves.
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But let's give the movie credit where it's due, the location it was shot was kinda perfect. Some of the shots resemble the Iconic Star Wars (Talking about the first trilogy and not the crapfest the recently released). Not going to lie, but I enjoyed my own stupid jokes more than the movie. But my wife was furious and annoyed so much so that she walked out right at the 45-minute mark to the kitchen. “Nahi ho raha mujhse, Jaa rahi mein.” [Eng Translation - I am done with this one. I am going.]. I guess that the common reaction from many audience members across the world.
So, I wasted 1 and a half hours of my life, and the movie ended with the Title card “SURVIVRE”. I laughed so hard that I scared my wife. She came running from the kitchen to check on me.
“Kya hua?” [Eng Translation - what happened?]
“Inke title card mein spelling mistake hain.. Dekho” [Eng Translation - They got their title card wrong]. I paused the screen and showed it to her.
She saw the screen and looked at me with a disappointed look. Probably wondering how dumb this man can be.
“French movie thi naa ye?” [Eng Translation - Wasn't it a French Movie?]
Hi Folks
This movie is not for everyone.
I am not sure how to receive it, but it was like watching some of the Indian TV Daily soap operas, where you keep searching for logic and explanation, but there is none. Let me be clear, my views here are on the final product, the movie itself and not on the people. I understand that the movie is a collective effort, and it needs a lot of things to align to be right. Looks like a lot went wrong with this one. And I am not an expert in directing or writing or editing, or any of the cinema techniques. I am just a guy who enjoys movies.
As always, thanks to IndiaUnited and BeAwesome community for their love and support. I am still working around the finance-related blogs and will be posting that soon, too. So, Stay tuned. ☮️💟
