It was the moment I had been waiting for...it seemed like forever. Having blogged for years, I had finally attained my long desired goal: to get a slider.
Boom! Now we’re talking. Blogging King, King of the Bloggers right here comin’ atchya, matey!
As my newfound powers rippled through the cryptoverse, an influx of thirsty bitches came crawling on their hands and knees, awaiting me to rain that sweet sweet coin on their asses.
[Imagine "Making it Rain" gif]
Distributing upvotes at fractions instead of full hundos got me sprung. Too sprung. Way too sprung in fact. The power started to get to my head.
[Insert "He-Man" gif here]
I finally decided to go to the trending and new pages to splooged my fraction vote on every post.
Then came the beggers…swarming. They had heard of my flexing. So many inane comments. So many beggers. They wouldn’t stop. Always swarming. Swarming like the undead.
[There was that scene from that zombie movie where they crawled on each other I think it was World War Z, I can't be fucked to look it up. Just imagine that as a gif.]
That’s when I realized that the power wasn’t all I dreamt it to be.
Anyway this is an aligory for Sword of Damocles or something. I don’t know.
Then she looked lustfully at my slider and said “I’d love to see how you use that thing”.
Then they had sex.
The end.
(Mehopes ye got as sprung readin' this as I did writin' it. Postin' to Black Sheep Bloggers, me new favorite initiative.)
(Gifs not from anywhere because I can't be bothered to make them work, like a real pirate)