Hello mga ka-Hive. How have you been? I hope all is well. Today marks the 8th year since my mother's passing. So I'm going to share to you guys the person behind the woman I have become.
Disclaimer: Most of the photos were blurry and have poor resolution since cellphones before didn't have good camera qualities.
Born on the 23rd of November 1967, a beautiful woman who became our mother. She is the eldest among the four children of my grandparents. She graduated with a degree in Commerce in Cebu Roosevelt Memorial Colleges. Months after graduation, goal driven as she is, she flew to Manila to find a better opportunity. Also, poverty strived her to go beyond her comfort zone. Obviously, she wanted her family to get out from it. She found a sales lady job at one of the shoe stores in Manila and months after, as one of the auditors of a pharmaceutical company in Makati. It was where she met my father. Working in the said company had changed her life. She began healing her inner child by purchasing the things she was deprived of and helping her family to get out of poverty.
My mama at work. Photos taken from her Facebook account.
She met my father who had the same hometown as her, got into a relationship and got married. They were high school schoolmates. What a small world. At the age of 26, she had me, her first daughter who made her a mother and Lola's first grand daughter. They moved to San Pedro, Laguna from Makati as they wanted to rent a house for their growing family and to minimize their cost of living. Two years after, she then had my second sister. Life was going well for her and the family not until my father got diagnosed with diabetes that completely changed his life. His health and weight went down abruptly.
Them with their colleagues. Papa is wearing red while mama in pink.
Mama, me and my sister.
My father desired to go home in Bogo for good for he wanted a calm and peaceful environment that could help him heal. My mother, with a lot of contemplating, eventually agreed to his decision as she prioritized his health above all. In 1998, we moved to Bogo and lived with my grandmother, mother's mother. That move definitely challenged my mother because she and my father were both jobless. They were back to square one. Though we lived in my grandmother's house, we could not solely depend on her.
To make ends meet, my mother worked hard by doing sidelines such as assisting real estate agents in searching for clients and processing their documents and selling items while the brother of my father bought him a tricycle for his source of income. She received offers from companies but the pay could not sustain our daily needs compared to the pay she receives in the real estate industry. She was just being practical. Slowly, they have earned enough to build a house of our own coupled with their savings when they were working in Laguna. Something we could call home. She got pregnant, bringing our youngest out to the world.
Her in action as part of the real estate.
The unexpected turn of events.
On December 24, 2001, my father had fever that triggered his disease until it got complicated. He was back and forth to the hospital. On the 31st of the month, he went to be with the Lord at the age of 35, leaving us four, her girls. It was devastating to know that he was taken away from us too soon. More so, it was harder for my mother being widowed at 33 years old. Days of mourning and missing him went by. There were days where we were doing fine yet healing is not linear, so there were times were we break down most especially my mother. I knew anxiety creeped in her thinking how could she be able to raise us three all by herself.
With no much understanding of the world, me and my sisters continued living without knowing that father's passing had created a huge responsibility to my mother. But surprisingly, she remained strong and tough and moved forward. She was able to provide us our needs and also our wants. We were very sheltered and well provided. She was able to send us to a prestige University.
Year 2014.
Year 2015.
Year 2022. We know she was celebrating with us during our youngest's graduation.
She was a stage mother and was super supportive of our endeavors, from our studies, extra curricular activities in school, our hobbies even our love life. She was proud of our achievements in school that she would always brag us to her friends. She was a cool mother that she would bond with our friends and was very updated with the technology and social media.
Our home was the rendezvous for dance practices, group projects and such. She would always store a lot of food for all of us.
Food was our bonding and she would always make sure to have a family day every Sunday. We would go to different restaurants even those fancy ones for us to be acquainted with them. She wanted us to experience the good things in life which she had never experienced when she was young.
Some of our eat out sessions.
She was also able to cope with the challenges that came along her way. She was our superhero, we always run to her every problems we had. To me, it seemed like it was easy for her. Now that I am a part of the workforce, I began to wonder how she was she able to do all of those considering that life is a constant struggle. I believe that is what a mother's love could do. The extraordinary love could make you do things exceptionally. She did not even remarry and just focused on us. She said that she found joy seeing us all happy. She was both our mother and father and for that, I salute her for doing all of those at once.
Our very strong independent mama.
But little did we know that a bucket of tears were shed every time she was alone at home. I later found out that she would always visit father's grave and asked for guidance. She would also tell him jokingly of his early demise and then cried her heart out expressing all her worries. Her strong faith in God was what kept her going. Without Him, she would have already surrendered.
On July 30, 2016, unfortunately God took her away from us because of stroke at the age of 49. I believe that her time on earth has ended. I think she misses my father. Her death had significantly affected us and turned our lives 360 degrees. It took us years to accept that she is already gone. She was my safe space and my best friend. The only person whom I reached out to every time I have manic Mondays and anxieties. There is not a single day that I don’t miss her. Though she is not present physically, I know she is guiding us spiritually.
Before going to work today, I went to her grave to pay respect. How I miss her dearly. I miss her voice, her hug, her laugh and her words of wisdom and encouragement. I miss her calling me "ate".
Talked to her for a while.
We could not choose our mother but I was lucky and glad that she became mine and if given the chance to go back in time, I would not trade her for anyone or anything else. She was the best mother one could ever have. I strive hard for her to be proud of me. She is my inspiration in everything that I do and all that I am today is because of her. And with that, I am beyond grateful of her. If she could do it, so can I.
And that everyone, is my Mama Brescy, My Mother, My Hero, My Inspiration.
Until my next blog. Thank you for reading.
With so much love - XOXO,
Bev 😘