Don't you find it strange, and extremely bizarre, that no matter where a woman is found; almost without exception the only pattern that repeats itself is some experience related to some time of violence...? This post is not going to victimise any woman or use opposites to make a point.... But what I am going to do is relate my own experience and try to show a reality that some prefer to omit, and also a brief reflection on how bad some of us girls tend to be to our peers....
A friend, and even my boyfriend, have confessed to me and told me in conversation in confidence that the way men are brought up, mostly by women (grandmothers, mothers, aunts, older cousins; all women) they are not usually taught much about violence towards the opposite sex. In fact, they themselves have revealed to me, that the pressure they have from the time they are boys is totally and completely different from the way girls are raised and educated. Few consequences are imposed when a brother hits a girl, being her sister to give just one example vago..... Quibbles aside, the origins of violence run deep and are also controversial.
On the one hand, there is the sexualisation of language when referring to women. Another, less studied and sadly little debated, is the dangerous normalisation of machismo in childhood that is born in women who mentally and ethically form those men who are ‘infected’ believing that girls, besides being ‘objects’, are also their personal ‘possessions’. I know that this statement is controversial, but I have suffered it myself (with my mother towards my older brother) and also as a witness in other cases. And these anecdotes are repeated regardless of latitude or social status.
It is often thought that it is this lack of education that fosters structural violence, and perhaps there is some truth in that, but the cultural context represents a phenomenon that is undeniable and regrettable.... In many parts of the world, the sex you are born with and possess between your legs determines the quality and freedom in all aspects of your life. It is then, inequality and little empathy, which often makes us doubt the pain of others or the accusations and denunciations that women express and which end in absolute nothingness, without human warmth, without support and without voices that back up those who need help... Even we women alone can be cruel and frankly negligent towards other women.
Even in the 21st century, ‘competition’, gossip and cruelty between women is still normal and customary. .... We still blame the other woman, the mistress, for what the husband or partner has done. We doubt the woman who is kind, polite and close; we think that ‘they always come with cunning intentions’? So, yes, violence is one of the most unfortunate and harshest patterns that bind women all over the world. It is easier to have a bad experience related to some display of violence, than to know how to recognise an orgasm.... It is time to reflect, to act and definitely to change - for the better.