Who can relate? When you decide for the first time to have a new haircut or hair color, there are these mixed emotions and thoughts because you don't know at first if you'll look good in your new hair, but at the same time, you're excited for your new look. And there is this feeling that you feel like you're so brave to try something new. The feeling of having a different version of yourself.
Way back in my younger days, I always had long hair that I didn't want to cut or make shorter. I remember I would always hide behind doors and even inside my lolas cabinet whenever they intended to cut my hair, and I definitely cried when they did.
Fast forward to my teenage years, where I started watching Asian dramas, where mostly the main star will have this specific hairstyle, and I will definitely be inspired to do it on my hair, like braids, ponytails, side bangs, and so on. I remember cutting my own hair before just to get the hairstyle I wanted. I always maintain the mid-length of my hair, then grow it again up to my waist.
Then my hairstyle changed over time until, in my early 20s, I tried different haircuts and hair colors that I definitely loved and adored. I'm so happy every time I achieve the color and the haircut that I want.
Because of too much bleaching and coloring, my hair got damaged. Guess again what I did? While on my lunch break at work, I went straight to a hair salon and told the stylist to cut my hair short, and she was shocked at first because I'm always there at their salon and she knows how I love trying different styles on my hair. Well, that day, I was so determined to cut my hair shorter. I'm so eager to say goodbye to my dead locks, and I feel like a different person—like a fiercer and stronger version of me after my haircut. I still remember the faces of my coworkers when I entered the office. They said, "What happened?", What have you done? Are you crazy? and I just laughed it off.
Then the cycle of cutting my hair and coloring it stopped until I was in my late 20s. Yep, finally. Maybe I just got tired of changing hair color and cutting my hair. At present, I have started to grow my hair naturally. I find it simple and easier to take care of because I'll just shampoo and conditioner it, and that's it.
Just like my hair, I have changed these past few years. I think I am a better risk-taker now. Before, I was this person who was too shy to say what was on her mind and too dependent. Now that I have learned when to speak or express my opinion and feelings and when to remain silent, I can make decisions on my own. I am more open to criticism. Every failure means a new opportunity for me. Just like when I cut my damaged hair, it grew back to more healthy hair. Life will get better and better; just don't lose hope, keep on working on yourself, and don't be scared to cut those negative or toxic people in your life that are not helping you to be more productive or affect your growth as a person. And I realize it's normal to feel burnt out or too tired to do anything; we all have that moment. Take one at a time, make sure to take a rest, and most importantly, don't forget your health. We all know that "health is wealth."