Being a woman comes with so many challenges, just as men would say they face a lot of struggles in life, and irrespective of our gender, everyone has a story to tell. The challenges we face navigating through life and how we tackle them determine a lot of things about us, including the quality of our strength. Being called a strong woman is no joke and not just a mere praise. It's a testament to resilience, courage, and the ability to navigate through life challenges. It signifies a woman who has taken on and overcome challenges in different forms. It has nothing to do with lifting weight or physical prowess; it's about the mental, emotional, and even spiritual resilience.
I grew up around powerful women who have helped shape me into the woman I am becoming. These are people I admire a lot because of how they've pressed on in life despite every challenge life threw at them.
When my family comes together for something, I listen to their stories, but I couldn't understand until I was mature, and I still wonder up till now where some women got their strength from. My grandma lost her husband to a ghastly motor accident after she had her eleventh child. Her world came crashing down, and it's easy to imagine what life looked like for her coping with eleven children.
Her in-laws didn't make things easier; they stripped her of every possession her late husband had left behind. They blamed her for his death and threw her out onto the street with eleven children. She slept in uncompleted buildings, worked as a laborer to provide for the children, which wasn't enough, remarrying wasn't an option because no man would dare take a woman with that number of kids.
While going through these challenges, she lost two of her children and yet, she was determined to change her story without getting involved in anything dirty. She started with farming on lands that weren't occupied and gradually, owned her land. Although the journey was rough, all her children got an education, and today, they are doing well in their respective spaces. While grandma is still strong and healthy, she owns properties, turning her situation around.
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After I failed to get admitted into the university, I was at Grandma's place before traveling to stay in Lagos for a while. One night, grandma narrated her story to me for the umpteenth time, emphasizing the setbacks, rejection, and disappointments she experienced.
She said, "Sometimes, things do work as planned but it doesn't mean the end. Life wants you to get stronger before achieving what's not working for you at the moment. These minor setbacks shouldn't interfere with your dream, they should make you stronger."
I sat on my bed and cried that night, not just for myself, but her story and the advice she gave touched the deepest part of my heart. I held on to that advice tight, and it's working for me because whenever I meet negativity on my journey, I double up my efforts, and it's rewarding.
If there is a definition for a strong one, I think my grandma is a perfect example, and I appreciate that simple advice making a great impact on me.