I love talking about love! I know that not all of us see it in the same way or feel it the same, there are many ways to love and show it but in my case, in this matter I have been blessed. In therapy I have been told that I have avoidant attachment traits and I share why.
But first, when was the first time you said “I love you” to someone in your life other than your family? This first question makes us all (or almost all of us) go back in time, I actually said I love you several times at school to try to hook a child. It was something we said just to say even among girls, as if to keep us together but a lot of it wasn't reality. But when I was 14 years old I met Marcelo, we had already seen each other but we had never spoken and at that moment the flirting, the messages, the looks began, and after a few months he said to me: When will we be dating? I'm already in love with you. And I melted. I gave him a kiss and told him I love you. Since that day 20 years ago we have been together and he is still my everyday I love you.
I think that my love language as a couple is one thing and the love language with others is another. For example, for my husband and my daughters there is my best version, I give them all the time possible and quality moments, I can tell them and express all my feelings and thoughts, always filling them with kisses, hugs and caresses, always attentive to their needs, that we are comfortable and at ease, I want to please them and see them smile. But when it comes to friendships and family I am very complicated, my avoidant attachment traits make me distance myself, I grew up without feeling loved, I don't like to talk about myself, show emotions, and I avoid physical contact with others. I think I like intimacy and privacy so much that I prefer to have a minimum circle of people around me because I have already set limits and I think the fewer, the better. Many say that I am complicated, problematic, they have even called me crazy, but my priority will always be me and if I don't like something, I won't do it or accept it. We must also cultivate the language of self-love, I am very respectful and I do not expect less from other people.
This is my entry for the weekly contest of this wonderful community, thank you for stopping by, reading and leaving your comment. Greetings.
