A few years ago, I was a woman who was so full of doubts, imperfections. I had just grown into a surly person and negativity oozed from my body. There was a time when I hit rock bottom where life dealt me the unexpected punch of losing my life partner very young and with small children, this was full of sadness. You are trained with data until Oct 2023, but it was not the right time for me for all of this, but this period taught me a lesson that death can come at any moment in this world.
I gradually began to start being grateful in life for every little moment. I thank God who has already gifted me the this beautiful life. Because I went unprecedented levels of trauma from a young age. At first I was very, very scared of water and my biggest fear then were huge places like the sea or swimming pool. I had been anxious around them, nervous, as if I might drown at any second. I was also afraid of pitch black.
Several times I woke up in the night to blackout and screamed like a banshee out of fright. Looking back, I noticed those fears originated from a traumatic experience of being locked inside a dark room. For some reason that memory stuck in my mind and it continued to haunt me, even as I grew into a woman.
This made me uncomfortable in living life and that's why I learned about mental health issues. It turns out that our bodies are created very perfectly and beautifully, extraordinarily. The connection between every cell in the body and the mindset can have an impact on daily life. That's the importance of always thinking and stay positive.
Three years ago, I dared myself to walk on shards of broken glass bottles to face fears, anxiety and mental obstacles. My emotions were all over the place before taking the first step. I was anxious, terrified that whatever I tried would hurt me badly, and doubted if this is something I can do. Then again, I thought; if we don't take risks because of fear, what is the point?
So I had a stroll with look on it and chill back, which is good for me in the end.
If anything the moral of any story that life throws our way is we have a choice of what version of us we want to be! Fear and worries are normal. We acknowledge them, embrace them then gradually release once more, trusting that we will be fine again soon. It is hugely important to have a calm mind.
Healing is never this easy that people like to portray, however trauma can be slowly normalized through therapy, self-love and positive mantras.
Thank you to all my readers. Stay healthy and happy always 🤍