[image by;] (@ladiesofhive/ladies-of-hive-community-contest-45)
Hello, ...
This is my first time participating in a contest in this community.
If you could tell us one secret about yourself that no one knows, what would that be?
This is a question that not many people dare to answer. But, here I am! I want to tell you even the world about a secret. I'm following this because I got a challenge from my hive friend 
I'm deaf.
Yeah... It's not completely deaf which makes me have to use sign language. But I really have a hard time hearing clearly without good articulation. Every time I talk to other people I have to pay attention to their lips. One of my ears has been dysfunctional since birth.
Since when?
From birth. I was born in the seventh month of pregnancy. The doctor said I was premature. Since childhood I look normal. Just like any other baby, I grew up sick and cried loudly every time I was hungry. Hahaha
When I was in elementary school, my parents realized that my ear function was not completely normal. They took me to an Ear, Nose and Throat (ENT) specialist. After examination and ear irrigation, the doctor said my ear condition will improve.
A month after that first examination, nothing had changed in my condition. I still can't hear normally in my right ear. My left ear is still normal.
How does it feel to grow up different?
I was young and my world was fine. However, when I was in the fifth grade of elementary school, I received unpleasant treatment from my classmates.
During the Independence Day carnival, I really enjoyed wearing a nurse costume. White uniform, white shoes, and white nurse's hat. I imagine that one day I will be a nurse or a doctor! Wow amazing!! Helping sick people to get well soon is amazing in my opinion.
But, not with them!
To them I'm weird. I'm no fun being deaf, I can't possibly be a doctor! There are no doctors who are deaf in this world! So they said. So the remaining two years of my elementary school, I had to face bullying.
My only friend is Hani
The whole class doesn't want to be friends with me except Hani. He didn't say anything to defend me every time I was attacked, but at least he sat beside me and didn't leave. Thank you dear Hani.
Since then, I hate bullying at any cost!
Coping with deafness
God cannot be unfair. If bad humans are near me, there must be a lot of good humans out there who want to be friends with me. I joined theater friends at the theater "Sarang Matahari" I met many good people who taught me how to enjoy life with shows. Then, I also had other good friends in the "Dapoer Sastra Tjisaoek" community who also taught me the performing arts. Then, I met the Cendol writing community which was really amazing. I was taught how to use good and correct language, how to write poetry, and how to make other interesting stories. Also, I have friends every time I climb the mountain. There's always a new good friend coming.
Golden moment
In 2019, the Reader Festival was held in Bandung with the theme "Reading Rights for Diffables". My friend I called Bunda Astuti, was invited as a resource for that day's discussion. Bunda Astuti is a feminist, and disability protection activist in the city of Solo. Bunda Astuti invited me to attend a seminar.
Bunda Astuti always told me that humans who are born different are special.
In this seminar I found other great friends; Billy Birlan Purnama, a leader of the movement for the welfare of the Deaf Indonesia (Gerkatin), Ogest Yogaswara (fyi; Ogest is a former child singer who has had two albums) he has suffered from the autoimmune disease Guillain Barre Syndrome (GBS) since the age of 17 years. Aden Achmad is a physically disabled person, and Muhammad Budi Pramono is a disabled person with Celebral Palsy. Also there are many other special friends of mine here.
So, do I regret being born different? Big no!
My Big Super Power
I wrote it on the back to make an impression on the reader. My mother is my big super power. After my father passed away, my greatest strength in the world was my mother. A mother who is never ashamed of my condition, a mother who always supports my decisions. Maybe it's true what a wise man said, "A mother is the only one person who will give the whole world to the child."
I love you, Mom.
How many friends do I have now?
Many!! They didn't leave just because I was deaf.
So if anyone asks,
If you could change bodies for a day with anyone, who would it be and why?
I still want to be myself because I'm strong and great like my mom said
So, this is my biggest secret. Maybe I didn't become a doctor, but I became a warm friend to others.
Thanks for reading.
