Good day, ladies, TGIF
As usual, our community has done it again with this week’s topic. When I saw the questions, especially the first one, the only person that came to my mind was my mother, Mummy Tayo, as many fondly call her.
Questions:
What's the best advice you have ever received from a strong woman? Describe a strong female character who inspired or inspires you
and or
Write about a time you overcame self-doubt
Ah, where do I even start? I have met, and still meet, several inspiring women in my life, but none can compare to my mom, not just because she’s my mother, but because she is a woman with a large heart, strong values, and great discipline.
I have watched her go through many of life’s storms, including the painful loss of her first son, my younger brother, at age 24. Yet, she somehow finds strength from places I can’t explain, to keep moving forward and carrying the family on her shoulders, just with God, as she always says.
Her physical strength at almost sixty is impressive, but her emotional and mental resilience is unmatched. She has inspired me in countless ways, often without even realising it, and she has played a massive role in shaping the woman I am today.
When life hit me with its most brutal blows, I knew it affected her deeply, too. I could see the signs of heartbreak on her face each morning, but still, she rose every day to tell me, “It’s just a storm and it will soon be over.”
I call her My Sunshine, a prayer machine, the spiritual covering of our family. As a single mother, she raised three successful graduates single-handedly. She is the epitome of hard work, and I learned independence from her at a young age, a value that has carried me this far in life.
She is the only person who has ever stood by me in the operating theatre all three times I have gone under the knife. How she managed her anxiety during those times, I will never understand. Even when she was scared to her bones, she never showed fear; she just kept showing up.
One thing that still amazes me about her is how easily she mothers, cares for, and nurtures others who are not her biological children, even my friends. She prays for them, welcomes them, and trusts them. Her trust, though, is both a strength and a weakness, and I’ve learned from her experiences in that regard.
There’s never a day that passes without me learning something from her. She has taught me contentment, honesty, love, and to always stand for the truth, even when it’s against me. She has taught me to keep showing up for myself and for others, to be bold and confident, values I am proud to be passing down to my daughters.
From her, I learned to be disciplined, firm, and a go-getter, to never give up on my dreams. I could go on and on, but truly, she has shaped me into the woman I am today, and I am super proud of it.
Now, to the first part of the question:
One of the most powerful pieces of advice I’ve ever received came from my former landlady, who later became my godmother.
About four years ago, before my biological mother even knew the ordeal I was silently going through in my marriage, this woman, with her large heart, took me as one of her own.
When I got pregnant with my second daughter, I was pressured by my ex-husband and his mother to abort the pregnancy and keep it secret because it wasn’t planned. I couldn’t tell anyone, not even my mother, because I didn’t want to worry her. But I confided in my landlady, and she strongly advised me against abortion.
She even took it upon herself to call my mother and, in her own wise way, revealed what I was going through in my marriage and how badly I was being treated behind my back, a move I remain grateful for when I later found out.
I thank God that I listened to her, because that pregnancy has now given birth to my beautiful three-year-old daughter, full of life, joy, and purpose.
I would have been full of regrets if I had never taken the initiative to confide in her and to heed her advice. I am forever grateful to Alhaja, as we fondly call her.
Touching on the second question about self-doubt...
I started my healthy drink business in January this year, and from the very beginning, I knew I wasn’t selling the regular kind of drinks that others sold.
Initially, pricing was a significant challenge because people often questioned why my drinks were more expensive. The truth is, the price matched the quality; every bottle was made with care, the best ingredients, and properly sealed in hygienic packaging. But convincing people of that value wasn’t easy at first.
A few weeks into the business, however, things began to change. Despite the pricing challenge, people started recommending my drinks to others. To put things in perspective, while others sold their drinks for about ₦100 in used bottles, I sold mine for ₦500 and ₦ 1,000 for 250ml and 50cl bottles, respectively, all neatly sealed and attractively packaged.
From the start, I knew those selling around me weren’t really my competitors. Still, I sometimes struggled with self-doubt about the quality of my drinks, despite receiving all the positive feedback.
In my head, I would often ask myself: “Is it worth it? Would I make more sales if I reduced the price?” Manyrealisedknew my drinks were top quality but still passed because of the cost. At one point, I e,ven considered switching to nylon packaging to lower prices. But when I did the math, I realized that maintaining the same quality standard would still cost almost the same to produce meaning I might sell more but end up running at a loss.
For weeks, I searched for ways to balance quality and affordability. Then one Saturday, something happened, that completely changed my perspective.
One of my loyal customers and her husband called to order their usual drinks. When I delivered, they both eagerly grabbed their first bottles like their lives depended on it. They usually buy two bottles each of my Zobo and Ginger Xclusive drinks.
After enjoying their drinks, the wife shared an experience that stayed with me. She told me how they had, recently boght “healthy Zobo drinks” in Abuja at double the price of mine, ₦8,000 for four 50cl bottles, meaning ₦2,000 per bottle. They expected something similar to mine or better as she said standardscording to her, the taste was so awful that the drinks sat in their hotel fridge for four days untouched.
She commended me for maintaining my quality and not compromising my standard, no matter what others were selling, and said she doubt if she can consume any other healthy drinks aside from mine due to that experience.
That moment completely erased my self-doubt. I stopped looking for shortcuts to make more sales and embraced the truth. what I sell is premium, and it’s not for everyone. It’s for those who know and appreciate quality.
Since then, that mindset shift has helped me focus on reaching the right audience rather than trying to sell to everyone. And that, for me, is growth.
Thank you for reading.
Have a lovely weekend