I used to think I was running out of time.
Now I think time was standing there with a clipboard, saying:
“My love, the problem is not me.”
Rude.
But fair.
Because sometimes “I don’t have enough time” really means:
I said yes too quickly.
I ignored my body’s unsubscribe request.
I treated every message like a small emergency with WiFi.
I confused being needed with being well.
There is a tired that a great cuppa tea or coffee cannot fix.
Not even the fancy ones with lemon, ginger, honey, hope - butter….bulletproof nothing!
It is the tired that comes from doing too much for too long, while convincing yourself you are “just being responsible.”
And listen, darling: responsibility is beautiful,
But guilt in a blazer is still guilt.
So this week, I am asking myself:
What am I doing because I chose it?
What am I doing because I fear disappointing someone?
What feels urgent only because I never gave myself permission to pause?
Maybe time is not always asking us to move faster.
Maybe time is asking us to stop abandoning ourselves in the name of being useful.
And honestly?
I would like to be useful.
But I would also like to be moisturised, rested, and emotionally available to myself.
Baby steps.
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Image caption: This sun seemed to be setting far too quickly.
By the time I noticed it, grabbed my phone, opened the camera, and took five photos, it had already dropped out of view.
So I caught what I could through the lens.
A small reminder that time does not wait for us to feel ready.