The health challenges over the last few years have left me out of shape physically, mentally, but most of all, socially.
At first it was gradual, and I did not notice it was happening. It was a natural thing. Even before COVID I was forced to start working from home. Eventually, I was no longer able to drive myself places and was dependent on others for transportation. Eventually I just stopped physical contact with most people, unless it was when I had to go out for an appointment or something.
Then there was social media. However, the current state of un-social media like Fakebook and Twatter left me feeling frustrated. I finally just gave up on them as well. I drifted away from communicating with long time friends and family on Fakebook even.
Now I find myself trying to exercise my body as part of a case study. Then there is the daily reading and attempts at crossword puzzles I try to keep my brain as sharp as I possibly can. However, what I am failing to do is exercise my socialization skills. This is something I know I must add to the routine but is scarier and more challenging to me than even the physical exercise.
Reflecting today on this issue, the hole that has been dug is so deep, I am not sure I can dig myself out of. If I am honest, I just have no desire anymore to physically make contact and socialize anymore. The reason why is unknown to me. Maybe because I am getting to be a cranky older bastard? Is it because I have grown to hate people? I do say I like my dog more than most people, so that might be.
What I do know is I have to work on this, and like the physical and mental exercise I started, it is going to require small steps. What steps those are and where I take them, I do not know yet, but I am putting the thought into it for now.
Just reflecting on this today, writing this, and putting into words has helped to materialize the reality of the problem that must be addressed and the challenge that must be overcome. I hope to soon start making those small steps once again, and the first one has been here on Hive.
Not sure if any of this makes any sense or is just the ramblings of a sleep deprived goon. However, if you have read this far, thank you for entertaining me.
Have a good one,
Joe
Note: Image created using Canva