I just had my first conversation about sex with my oldest son (13 years old). Yes, I know, it may seem too young, but given the current society situation, I don't think so. Besides, I've been trying for a while to somehow get him to open up to me completely. Besides his father, whom I consider and am his best friend, as his brother, who I insist should be his best friend, I, the other best friend, have more experience and can help with things and issues that his brother, who is younger, can't yet.
No one taught me anything. I'm not grateful for it, and at the same time, I am, although some advice or a word of guidance might have been helpful, but well, there wasn't any, and luckily, I don't think I needed it. I've handled these intimate matters quite well. I learned everything through stumbles, mistakes, exploration, reading, stories, other people's experiences that I listened to attentively, and through practice, which is what gave me the most. It was also very helpful to have very good female friends. I learned a lot from them in every way possible.
It all happened because I took some photos with his phone, which since my wife isn't home is the one I use for taking photos since mine is useless for those matters(fuck it). When I was about to send them to myself via WhatsApp to use in a post I was writing, in the recent archives I saw some women, you know, just like God brought them into the world, doing those things you know, to themselves, them doing stuff with other women, or them with males them. Anyway, he (my son) got scared; he thought I was going to scold him for it, but no, it was really what he needed to get him to open up and finally dare to have that conversation that no one had with me. I didn't force him, no, no, not at all. I just told him that it was quite normal at his age, in which he was experiencing new things he didn't know about yet, but that he should be a little careful with the visibility of those kind of files. I asked him if his mom knew about it, and he said no. To give you an idea, I'm a bit liberal and open when it comes to sex, and he has more Telegram channels on his phone about it than I could have at his age, me who at his age was the devil's paw, hahaha.
Anyway, I told him that I, at the time, saw a lot of that, and that, in addition to getting turned on, I took it as an educational way and learned a lot about the subject, just by watching, analyzing points, projections, reactions, stimulation... I also read a lot about it because I was interested in exploring it thoroughly and being, in that sense, the best I could be, not only to enjoy myself, but also to make the woman who was with me enjoy herself as well. I also told him it was normal at his age, that he also had to remember that I, in addition to being his dad, am his friend, and that whenever he wanted, he could talk and ask me whatever he wanted about the subject, a topic I'm no expert on, but that I could teach him a couple of things I'd learned along the way if he wanted me to. It didn't take him 10 minutes, and he was already asking me questions. Questions I won't say, topics I won't go into detail, but which, although they may be uncomfortable for some, not for me, and from what I could tell, for him, weren't either. They constituted the icebreaker, the one I never had at his age and that he already had. I'm very happy about that. He now knows that with his dad, he can talk about anything( something I've said to him and his brother many times), he doesn't have to hide anything, I'm here to help him in any way I can and to clarify any doubts he may have.
It was, truly, a wonderful and, from what I can see, productive moment. The ice is broken, that's what matters. From now on, I'll be there to provide whatever he needs. Let him learn from me whatever he wants, and the rest, he'll learn on his own adventures.
