This week an old co-worker who had been serving in another place for more than three years has been reintegrated, he has gained some weight, what has not changed is his attitude of always wanting to be right and justify everything he does, he did not learn anything because of the difficult health situation he went through, but people are just the way they are as my mother says, old parrot does not learn to talk.
When I saw him I greeted him and asked him how his wife was doing since the last time I saw him she was undergoing treatment for cancer at the same time he had problems with appendicitis and then he had to sell his properties to recover his and his wife's health.
Difficult, isn't it?
The truth is that when I arrived at the office he told me that his wife is still battling with cancer, but that it is going little by little when he proudly commented that he has a daughter with another woman, the girl is 3 years old.
Do you think it was betrayal?
When I asked him if his wife knew about it he said yes..... How do you tell a convalescent person your betrayal? don't you know that what she needs the most is emotional support, there he gave me a number of reasons why he decided to have another family justifying his action.
What bothered me about his attitude was not what he had done, I am not the one to judge someone else's life, but the pride with which he told me did not cease to bother me. That is what she has to see what I am there with her because they are 25 years married, if it bothers her that she has a daughter out of wedlock why not divorce? Those words were super bad for me.
In truth, maybe because I am a woman I put myself in the place of the wife dealing with a deadly disease, the truth is that finally after telling what for him is a daring for the way he told it the laughter ... I asked him a question what would happen if the cancer was you and she gets pregnant and brings you the baby and justifies herself as well as you are doing it?
His answer was that women don't do that, I would have left her, exactly that is what you have to do, I would have done it, finally I was left thinking not in what my partner did as I said I am not the one to judge, but in how skillful we are in placing any situation in our favor defending the indefensible.
We are so desperate to justify our behavior that we look for infinite reasons that only we believe it, we are so used to act in a way that we believe we are right, the truth is that as long as your reasons and justifications do not hurt other people there is no problem, but if it is the opposite, we must improve especially with our loved ones.
An emotional wound can be very damaging to any human being Where is love and loyalty? I think you have to reflect and not be so self-centered and think that it is only about you.