For a while now I have been meaning to write a discussion post on a topic that seems to keep happening, where a sporting star after retirement, as done some stupid shit that has stopped them for example, being inducted into a hall of fame. My question around this is whether the hall of fame is based on their career and what they brought to the sport during it, or their social lives after? I am not defending their post-retirement actions, but for me it raises the question of what is being evaluated, and whether it is right to backdate and apply current situations to past accomplishments.
This came up from when I read of an Australian Football League player who was well respected as a player, but a decade after retirement, was convicted of stalking his ex, or some such. Yeah, that is pathetic, but should it take away from his sporting career?
I think that this is an interesting question to explore, considering that we have still supported some other stars that have been arrested and charged for domestic violence offences - Sean Penn, Nicholas Cage, Mel Gibson, Christian Slater, Ozzy Osbourne, Axl Rose, Charlie Sheen, Slash, Gary Busey, Tommy Lee, and Evel Knievel for fucksake. This doesn't make it right, but is there consistency in how we apply our judgement?
Now, I don't give one damn about any of these people, or any celebrities at all, as they tend to live in a world that is so far detached from my own, it is hard to understand their mentality. However, there seems to be a massive amount of entitlement, which is no surprise considering that they have been handed anything and everything to them on a platter for free, by us. At some point, that power must go to the head, right?
But, there are other questions I have around this topic, for instance, the current publicity "Diddy" (is that his name?) is getting about assault and the video beating some poor woman in a hotel room back in 2016. Now my question here is a bit different, because he released some video saying that he was disgusted at himself for the behavior, that he was in a bad place, and he got treatment afterward. So, the question is,
Is there any way to be forgiven?
For instance, if a drug addict did a whole lot of terrible shit to feed their addiction, and then got cleaned up, they would be celebrated. And now we live in a world where we are meant to be sensitive to mental health issues, where people can have problems that an affect their behavior. So as a laymen, from watching the behavior in the video of Diddy, I would posit that the fucker had some pretty severe mental problems to act that way.
This doesn't excuse the behavior.
Yet, shouldn't we be sensitive to the causes of the behavior too, in the same way that we would be if a person was autistic, or had ADHD? If a particular individual has been raised in an environment that encourages and promotes the development of strong entitlement feelings, where they have the sense that they are allowed to do as they please to others, shouldn't that factor into the judgement?
And then, have a look at the conversations around other topics similar, where there is talk about something like rape culture, where they think that men are the cause. However, rape might be a symptom of other issues, right? If you heard of a sociopath inflicting some form of pain on someone, you'd say "typical behavior of a sociopath", right?
These are some common signs of ASPD:
(antisocial personality disorder)
- Lack of empathy for others
- Impulsive behavior
- Attempting to control others with threats or aggression
- Using intelligence, charm, or charisma to manipulate others
- Not learning from mistakes or punishment
- Lying for personal gain
- Showing a tendency toward physical violence and fights
- Generally superficial relationships
- Sometimes, stealing or committing other crimes
- Threatening suicide to manipulate without the intention of actually doing it
- Abusing drugs or alcohol
- Trouble with responsibilities such as a job, paying bills, etc.
How much of Gen-Z hold a group of those traits?
My point is, that we have created a world where the individual and their needs is the center of the universe, and people are encouraged to do whatever it takes to get what they want from life. Personal branding and lying on social media for the superficial support of strangers for money, while relationships of any depth are deemed a waste of time. Impulsive behavior, poor financial hygiene, blaming others, manipulative, demanding, entitled.
So, if we are creating an environment that develops the kinds of behaviors that we would expect to see in sociopaths and psychopaths, why would we be surprised that those behaviors are increasing in society? We have reduced families, reduced communities, escalated individual consumerism, and told people to take what they want from life - then are shocked when they do.
Being a successful athlete, musician or actor doesn't make you a good person that is infallible and won't be influenced by the environment. They are humans too, and the environment that surrounds them is completely unrealistic and far outside of the normal experiences of the average person. Yet, we are also being influenced by how they are presented, their lifestyles, their desires, their own branding, which of course is going to affect our behaviors.
If you believe that something like our body image is affected by the media, then you also have to believe that these celebrities are going to be affected by their surroundings too, right? If we can't control what we put in our bodies because of advertising, how can we expect the people who are handed drugs for free on platters, and have groupies, not to be affected by the advertising they receive, where so many people are willing to give them whatever they want, just to be close to them.
We live in a fucked up world on many fronts, but we also have to recognize that we are all pretty similar in many ways, even if we behave differently. Sure, there are outliers, but as we are products of our environment, we are nearly all going to be affected, meaning that our behaviors are influenced actions, nudged by our circumstances and surroundings. We think that people are lucky because they are wealthy and famous, but they are just as likely if not more, to have various mental health issues too.
Should we factor this into the judgement?
As said, I don't care about these celebrities, but perhaps my reasoning for the article is to highlight more of the world we have created. It is a mess, where there are all kinds of conflicting conditions, and a lot of ambiguity in what we should do, whether for ourselves, or morally for a community. There are a lot of complexities in being human, and we are fragile in so many ways, so that when there is a large amount of change and a lot of options in front of us, we can end up stressing, breaking, and behaving in ways we might not have if we had been under different conditions.
Yes, we have to take responsibility and pay the consequences for our behaviors, but we aren't much of a society if we are only looking to punish, and there is no way out of a mistake. We are told to learn from our mistakes, and if we don't support leaning and improving, there is no point to change, no point to be better. If we are going to backdate, do we also backdate causes?
If we don't openly talk about these things and question them, then we aren't going to reach any kind of solutions that the majority of people are able to live by. Instead, it will just be more "us against them" attitudes, with a lot of doubling-down on stupid.
We can do better. Can't we?
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]