I am not a religious man.
But I accept a religious vacation.
And today is the Epiphany, which is meaningless to me, but in Finland at least, is still considered a day off. It meant that my wife and daughter had from Christmas week all the way through to today as holidays, but will be going back to school and work tomorrow.
Neither are looking forward to getting back into the normal routine.
My routine stays largely the same.
We had friends over for a late hotdog lunch and some raspberry pie for dessert, as well as playing some boardgames and chatting. It was nice and relaxed and I think that since they are getting back into work also, they appreciated the easy day. It was nice, as we haven't seen them for a few months together, so we caught up and listened to some funny stories that have happened recently.
I have the tendency to ruin the mood.
But I was really, really wary this time about not getting into any deep discussions, despite a lot of openings. In some way, I am a bit like an autistic person that just can't help myself from talking about things that I find interesting. Not a problem, except the things that I find interesting are usually not what others find interesting, and the way I see them, normally doesn't align with their own perspectives. It makes for good conversation with a few people, but terrible conversation with many.
So I bit my tongue. A lot.
That is okay.
Too many people these days feel that whatever they believe is important at the moment, and whatever they think about it, is crucial for everyone to know - and everyone should agree with their views. It is like people who have become vegan, having to tell everyone about it at any opportunity, even if they have to shoehorn it into the conversation. Except, it is about anything and everything. Whatever fad they are into, even if their entire position on a topic is from a single tweet.
Perhaps I am no better.
But I like to believe that I put some thought into what I talk about, even if it is an on the fly conversation. As I see it, conversations are not debates, they are explorations of topics, so people needn't agree, nor do they need to subscribe to one view or another. Rather, the conversation is for people to be able to discuss what might be an otherwise contentious topic, openly. But I only have a couple friends I can do this with. He was one half of the couple tonight, but instead of getting into anything too deep together, we both kept it light.
Enjoyable, but not as valuable.
At least, not as valuable from a growth perspective in regard to understanding. But, it was valuable in terms of building stronger relationships and even my wife said after they had left, it was a nice visit.
That was because I didn't talk much.
It is generally nicer when I don't talk much and instead just listen to people talk about their own things, even if I don't find them important or interesting. It is human nature, isn't it? We like to have conversations where we get to feel listened to on the things that are important to us, and we will experience the conversation as better, even though our counterpart didn't really talk. As long as they provide feedback that they are listening.
Silly, isn't it?
It is probably why so many people are leaning into AI conversations now, because they can be "listened to" without having to go through all the hardship and effort of building a relationship with a real person. Not only that, they will get the feedback they desire, from something that agrees with them, and even when the AI doesn't agree, it will give it in a very soft form.
The perfect friend.
It is funny though, because while many people seem to be embracing disconnection from reality, I have zero desire to chat to an AI. Zero. I would much rather talk to someone face to face, than even use a self-serve checkout. Or talk on the phone rather than get a text message. Or anything really. I just don't get how people are so content limiting their exposure to other humans.
And I am someone who doesn't like most humans! :D
I think at some point, people are going to paint themselves into a social corner that they can't get out of, and they will find themselves alone. However, perhaps a few will have their own epiphany along the way and course correct, before they are there facing the walk, talking to it.
I don't expect many to head into reality though, as it is just too easy and compelling to avoid all the problems reality brings to the table. Problems most people aren't interested in discussing, let alone looking for potential solutions. But maybe everyone is biting their tongues, because talking about what actually matters, is too uncomfortable.
Taraz
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