Haha, I've had that paradox before. And I kept quiet, although it probably would have been better to share. It is, indeed, a test. A test of what our true intentions are. What do we want to help or recognition?

It reminds me of a story I read about a thief who steals a talisman from a master. The thief tells him if you don't teach me how to use this talisman I will keep it and you will lose your power. And the sage replies, I am a master and I can create another talisman, but you have a talisman and with it you cannot create another master.

I think not doing the right thing ultimately hindered me, but then again, it's kind of a test. For everyone it is different.

Best regards to you!