Hola !! Bienvenidos queridos visitantes 🌷 | Hello!! Welcome dear visitors 🌷

A couple of days ago, I was remembering my last relationship and how much it affected me, both physically and emotionally. I was thinking about how much I got used to it and how that affected me during the seven years of our relationship. It sounds incredible to me that a long-distance relationship with someone I had never seen lasted so long, and although it may seem hard to believe and unreal, as my family said, it could have had such a huge impact on my life during that time. This is a topic I will discuss openly and honestly with you later, but today I will focus on the "you didn't love me, you just wanted me there."

During my relationship, as I mentioned, I became so accustomed to depending on someone emotionally to make decisions about simple things in daily life that I didn't realize how much it would hurt me later on. I didn't realize I was only with someone who just wanted me for emotional support, not because he truly felt anything sincere for me as one would expect in a healthy relationship, but because of the habit that had developed over all that time. We fell into the same old monotony and were getting used to only needing each other when we were feeling down. Besides, distance doesn't help in those situations, and we fell into that pattern; everything became commonplace. And since I've always been a very sensitive person, I didn't realize the great damage I was doing to my mind by allowing myself to be like that so much. For his part, he only got used to me for my company, just for the fact of having someone to fill the void, and that's not wrong in itself, really, but when you give too much importance to that, it becomes... In a kind of selfishness, you don't think about the other person's interests but only your own, about the emotional support that only you want to receive and not your partner's. When this happens to me, I start to feel empty and want to fill that void, to find solutions however I can. The fact that the other person is blind to it and refuses to do anything creates in me a certain need to no longer want to be in a relationship where you feel avoided and in complete mental instability. I start to feel bad, and it's time to look for a solution. The worst part is that I had to do it alone because when your partner insists on not seeing what they're doing, it hurts you and forces you to look for solutions.

It seemed impossible to try to repair something that, as I saw it, made no sense. Trying my best hadn't helped either, and I understood, talking to him, that he just wanted someone there as a kind of confidant; he didn't want a relationship as such, a relationship with responsibilities. And that hurt me a lot. I couldn't understand anything at all because at the beginning everything was nice and I could enjoy my normal relationship with him, but I realized that wasn't the case. There comes a point when you have to invent ten more lies to maintain one; you can't keep it to yourself anymore because one way or another you'll end up finding out. Sometimes we don't see it as so important to hide things only to have to reveal them later; it doesn't sound logical, but it had happened to me in my past relationships. That personal dependence on someone is what hurt me the most, but with time I understood that there's nothing better than forging things and truly waiting on someone who is worthwhile. You realize this by their actions, by what they are willing to do, by what they do from the beginning with honesty, without lies, and with sincerity. A year after my breakup, I can say that I have already found someone who has given me emotional and physical stability. And spiritual, that he doesn't think of himself but of me too so that I am well, and although I was used to being someone's shoulder to cry on, now I am, but with meaning, because my partner needs it and because it is mutual, because when I am bad and depressed he is there for me, because I have not gotten used to him being there just for the sake of being there, but to the great immense love he has for me, the effort he puts in, and how much we have learned to keep it alive.

When you truly love, I understand that the feeling you have isn't selfish, it's not a simple whim, and that love is strong, capable of enduring many things and facing them together. Now I can say that I'm ready to maintain a stable relationship without feeling the need to be there just for the sake of being there, but out of love, because that's what should motivate you to treat your partner and others well.

Creando las cosas con amor🌷♥️ | Creating things with love🌷♥️

Images:my own work | Edited by:Canva® and PicsArt © | Translator:Google Translate.