Dear minions,
Who the hell is Gwen?
Gwen has become one of Splinterlands most successful entrepreneurs overnight. She's got a real great glint shop.
I used to scavenge dead rotting monster corpses on the battlefield to look for loot chests. No more robbing graveyards,shopping at Gwen's is much more civilized (aside from her outrageous potion prices that will fleece me!)
But how did she launch this amazing business venture??!
When I search support or splinterlore for Gwen, there is no Gwen. Her identity is completely secret except for the fact I know she's Gwen, but I repeat, who the hell is Gwen?
Is she part of the Rebellion? The Chaos Legion? Is her shop somewhere in Praetoria so I can sneak in through the air ducts to steal potions?!
I can't believe nobody else is talking about the greatest mystery of our times...
Gwen has just established the biggest monopoly in all of Splinterlands history.
This is an amazing feat for someone with a secret identity never heard of before.
Was she summoned by the Dark Lord? I know he isn't a summoner, but I bet that guy has got some good tricks.
I have been an up-and-coming supervillain for 5 years now and all I have to show for it is a few useless monsters that freak out anytime they see a Scarred Llama...
"It's just a llama, not a piranha", I yell everytime they run from the battlefield...
I have soft mittens made from llama, but ok, somehow my legion of doom is splattered dead again, good job monsters.
Anyways...
I would love to open Deceth's Glint Shop.
I would sell primarily alligators. I would have a few types ranging from 'mostly harmless sun-bather gators' all the way to 'so-crazy-will-randomly-eat-your-own-team gators'. And I would reduce the price of potions and introduce a new potion that just-poof vaporizes llamas.
Seriously, did she even get a building permit, a shop isn't a regular building we can build on land...
I will unmask the secret identity of Gwen if it's the last thing I do, unless I give up, then it's the next thing I won't do which is close enough.
Mwahaha!!!