El día huele a ti
It's dawning and raining. As I make my morning coffee, I listen to the drops hitting the windows, the roof of the house, and the sound of the glass reminds me of you. I look out the window and see the lights of the vehicles trying to make their way through the fog, the orphan trees soaking in that fine moisture that falls serenely. I look at everything and the landscape proclaims to you: it is you converted in this morning.
Cierro los ojos y veo caminar tu sombra, sola, por toda la casa anochecida; tu sombra llena de cicatrices, de recuerdos convertidos en metáforas, de ojos que constantemente miraban hacia adentro como una lámpara triste. El insomnio no te dejaba estar tranquilo ¿Te acuerdas? y tú, con tus ojos aniquilados, te mirabas las manos como si en ellas vieras cómo poco a poco la línea de la vida se te acortaba.
I close my eyes and see your shadow walking, alone, all over the house at night; your shadow full of scars, of memories turned into metaphors, of eyes that constantly looked inwards like a sad lamp. The insomnia did not let you be calm, do you remember? and you, with your annihilated eyes, looked at your hands as if in them you saw how little by little the line of life was shortening.
Cuando llovía te gustaba contarme historias y éramos dos estrellas que gravitaban juntas: pájaros, con alas inexistentes, dispuestos a volar. A veces, cuando llovía, mirabas al infinito, como si frente a ti te esperara un gran mar sin puerto, donde ya estaba tu cuerpo, cansado de tanto andar. Otras veces, permanecías callado mientras yo te miraba desde lejos como una torre desolada, abandonada con el tiempo. ¡Y yo ya desde ese instante me preguntaba: oh, padre, en cuál cielo estarás!
When it rained you liked to tell me stories and we were two stars that gravitated together: birds, with non-existent wings, ready to fly. Sometimes, when it was raining, you looked at the infinite, as if a great sea without a port was waiting for you, where your body was already, tired from so much walking. Other times, you remained silent while I looked at you from afar like a desolate tower, abandoned by time, and from that moment I wondered: oh, father, in which sky will you be!
Llueve esta mañana y el sonido de la lluvia hace una grieta en mí. Desde hace tanto tengo la lluvia en los ojos y hoy que llueve afuera, vuelve el insomnio, vuelve tu sombra, la penumbra de tus pupilas que desde antes de irte, ya se habían ido de aquí. ¡Oh, padre en qué cielo estarás ahora, tú que con la lluvia te quisiste ir!
It rains this morning and the sound of the rain makes a crack in me. For so long I have had the rain in my eyes, and today when it rains outside, insomnia returns, your shadow returns, the twilight of your pupils that had already left here before you left. Oh, father, in what heaven will you be now, you who wanted to leave in the rain!