Missed Chance
Sometimes it happens and you only realize after.
I'm putting my groceries into my fabric shopping back, then into my side satchel.
I start to walk out of the store—then I see her.
I saw her last time. If she sees me I like to say hello.
She's so beautiful. I've always noticed her. Wondered about her.
She must be married, but I see no ring on her finger.
She must have a boyfriend.
But I am fantasizing.
I'm way too old for her.
I am too old now.
If I was 20 years younger, then maybe I would ask her out.
I am walking by where she is working.
I look at her lovely curves.
Nice body, very nice.
And what a face, especially when she smiles.
We said hello to each other last time and she smiled.
That smile kept me going all morning.
What an old fool I am. Old. Too old.
I am walking by her. She's talking with another employee.
She's busy. She won't see me this time.
The other employee, a woman too, looks over at me.
Then I notice the one I am so attracted to starts to look in my direction.
But what do I do? I look away and continue out of the store.
What am I thinking at this moment?
That I am focusing on her too much?
That I shouldn't try to be so obvious?
That I am just an old man?
A much younger woman like her would never be interested in such an old man.
I am not sure what I'm thinking.
But as I walk out the parking lot—I feel it, the loss, the missed chance.
The chance just to see her look into my eyes as mine look into hers.
Just to we say hello to one another!
Hello you beautiful creature you.
Oh God would I like to take you in my arms and kiss you passionately.
I would ravage you with tender caresses and fondle all of you like there's no tomorrow.
I would drink you up with a burning desire!
But instead I look away and keep walking?! Why?
Is it really because I feel foolish?
Because I am a pathetic old man, all alone, carrying a tattered satchel?
I must never miss another chance to see her beautiful smile.
I must take what I can get and live the moment to it's fullest.
Yes I am an old fool!
Not for dreaming or fantasizing, but for missing my chance.