I've been learning Python so do you see the not I dropped there?
A bunch of dumpsters in the beach was the perfect place to dump my controller
Prologue
It was just another day. I was hungry for free games after getting a taste of it from Epic Games Store. I needed more, a bigger hit. I went online and searched 'free games notify site' or something and up came the results. I surfed all those a bit and found a neat little site that would tell me in the future of any free games being given out.
Of course, as fate would have it, I would never be using it.
Because right after, I came across a site that was quite opposite to what I was searching for.
Why did I stop gaming?
I came across a few posts on a site that rhymes with saidit, after reading which I confirmed & realised I've been using gaming as an escape.
There was somebody who spent almost 2 decades gaming and found he gained nothing from it while regretting that it would've been beneficial to spend time doing anything other than gaming.
There was another person who seemed like my clone; almost 90% of their life is like mine: their thoughts, opinions, tendencies. They too quit, so I thought: Hmm, my clone quit. It wouldn't be wrong if I quit too.
And then I quit
Boom, uninstalled. Boom boom, uninstalled. All those games on my phone, I threw them in the trashcan.
It felt...wrong. Something my brain thought all this while to be enjoyable and nice, now suddenly it was going against that very thing.
Imagine how you'd feel if you stabbed your mother?
This felt worse.
Next, I'll be uninstalling Steam and Epic Games Store and every other launcher there is in existence.
You have to understand, there are so many unplayed games sitting in EGS, having to throw away all those (not permanently as it'll be in my account, but still) feels AAAaaaaa.
So what does this mean?
This means I got a new posting material. It also means I'm resuming Blender!
Double posting material!
Either life is going to be torturous, or my new activities will give me an experience more enjoyable than gaming.
This means facing whatever I'd been escaping and we'll find out what in the coming days.
I'll be getting a lot of time to put into coding, reading & learning stuff like cooking. I even was considering going out running.
Movie nights? I've been missing movies since a few weeks, so I'll keep movie nights everyday. Time to blaze through that to-watch list.
Retry?
I'd tried quitting multiple times before, only to end up back at it. But this time around it feels real. Probably because I spent the past 3 days without my computer (a part of it was given out for repair) and saw that it wasn't much of a big deal to not game.
Changes I've noticed so far
My mind isn't in overdrive as much as it was when I used to game. I think I've started appreciating my parents too and realising that one day they too will go kaput. All this wasn't possible when my mind was completely occupied and I was in a whole different universe of gaming.
Because of this, another change I'm foreseeing is I'll be more interested to know about the real world, my world, and might feel like exploring my city or talk to people.
My sleep cycle sees a marked change as I was easily able to get up at my new wake up time of 8 AM and go to bed at 12 AM (as opposed to the 10:30 AM and 2 AM of before.)
Parting words
This is crazy because never in my whole existence have I gone without gaming.
This could a major turning point.
Actually, I'll make it.