Welcome to my Mindful Moments, a safe space where I share my thoughts and reflections. Each episode is a personal take—honest, mindful, and rooted in curiosity. Whether it’s social trends, global events, or everyday challenges, I aim to explore these topics with intention and an open mind. Join me as I unpack the world around us, one mindful moment at a time.
Admit it or not, we are used to criticizing others or being criticized. It is part of life. We are criticized by how we act, how we talk, and how we do certain things. Some of us are taking criticism negatively. Is it because we cannot accept criticisms from others? Or is it because of their way of telling it?
It is fine to be criticized and to criticize, but it depends on how you do it and how you say it. Critiques are everywhere and in every aspect of life. In reality, we encounter them every single day. Sometimes we criticize ourselves for being this and that, for doing things and not doing them, and so on. But today, let me emphasize that there is CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. I am about to explain it further so that everyone can understand the whys and what this type of criticism entails.
First, let me define constructive criticism. According to The Web's Largest Resource for Definitions and Translations, the process of offering valid and well-reasoned opinions about the work of others, usually involving both positive and negative comments, is done in a friendly manner rather than an oppositional one. The key terms are already there. In constructive criticism, you must have a valid reason to criticize their work and make sure that it is in a friendly way so you can avoid offending them. To avoid conflicts, we must apply this one way or another.
What do we mean by having a well-reasoned opinion? It is either that you saw some flaws in them that you want to bring to their attention, or that you want to inform them. You must inform them of the issue and what they need to do to resolve it. Ensure that your opinion does not come across as negative feedback, but instead sounds like you want them to improve for the better.
You can't criticize someone just because you think they are doing better than you. This is reality. Some are criticizing others because they are doing better than they are, which is wrong. Some are criticizing others because they want the spotlight focused on them, which is obviously incorrect. If you have that kind of mindset, you'd better change it now.
To avoid worst scenarios like conflicts and misunderstandings, here are the tips on how to give constructive criticisms:
Use the Sandwich Method
The sandwich method instructs us to use praise statements before sharing areas for improvement. Start a conversation about how well they are doing, how they have met your expectations, and then work on identifying the areas they need to focus on or improve. It will not make you look less of a human if you praise someone else's work and actions. Additionally, you can point out areas for improvement in a constructive manner.
Consider the 'I' Language
Sometimes, using the 'I' language is better. You can start a conversation with "I think", "I'd suggest", or any other phrase that will lighten the mood of the person you are talking to. In using this language, the listener can understand that you are criticizing a situation or behavior, rather than the person directly. It will make them feel that you see and understand their situation by talking as if it were from your point of view. Because of this, the listener might know that it isn't a negative criticism at all.
Say Positive Praise
Never forget to praise the person or compliment their work and actions. In this way, they can take your criticism as a motivation. It is better to start a conversation about how you praise or appreciate them, and then you can mention the areas where they need improvement. It takes a good conversation to avoid conflicts and misunderstandings.
Tell Actionable Feedback
Do not criticize them as a person, but rather provide feedback on their actions that they can work on. The things that you are about to tell them should not demotivate them, but rather inspire them to improve and do better. They will listen to your feedback and apply it if you talk nicely.