Again I've been struggling with writing something here. It's not about what to write but to start writing. The first letter, the first word, the first sentence. And it's the same thing with post processing the photos I've taken. To sit down and do more than just opening the file I have the photos in. It's such a weary job to select which ones I like and which ones I don't. Most of the time it's the decision making that makes my brain hurt when there are lots and lots of almost similar photos.
Frog perspective, normal, vertical or horizontal, this corner here visible or not. And when I finally get to the point where I have chosen something, the same agony starts again in post processing. Darker, lighter, visible or cover it, where's the focus, what was I thinking?
At some point I start to think that perhaps making any decision is so hard because I've taken shitty photos. It's hard to choose because of there are no good options, not because of my poor ability to choose. I assure you, not every decision in my life is this hard. Normally I just choose something pretty easily because in some cases I just know immediately and in other cases I base the decision to rational reasoning. So why am I so terrible when it comes to choosing and post processing my own photos? Most of the time it's just impossible to choose and after a while I use the last resort, the last scientific procedure that I know. It's called the eeny-meeny-miny-moeing.
But I sure do like photographing.
There's a gravestone graveyard next to an old but still in use graveyard in Tampere. There go those gravestones that no-one takes care of anymore. Most of them are pretty old but some are barely over 50 years old which is kinda sad. Those people who thought that this will be their or their loved ones last resting place, forever, did not know how short time forever is if there no longer is no-one to pay for the care of the grave. People still die, people who have not been born before some of these people have died and as graveyard space in the city centre is scarce, old headstones (and bones) need to make way for new ones. It's a bummer for those who do not have a rich family or are not famous or who do not have any family left. "Sorry folks, the church needs your final resting place so we'll just toss your stone outside the graveyard walls."
Personally I couldn't care less what happens to me after I've died. Or to my body I mean. (Gotta keep some of those options still available for my soul, if I have one, so I'm not denouncing anything entirely.) But I fell for those poor people who have thought that it matters where their remains or at least their grave headstone lie. I can imagine them turning in their graves when they found out that they were evicted.
Nevertheless this place is really peaceful. It's a small place so you can see if there already is someone (living) strolling around there and given the nature of most Finns, one can photograph or examine the headstones there all alone which is nice if you want to take photos without people.
Although now that I think of it, with longer exposure and when it's not this bright as it now was, I could get pretty eerie photos with people moving and looking like ghosts in the photos. I better remember this thought some cloudy day and go headstone graveyard stalking. Perhaps I should make coffee and bread if I have to stalk for a long time because there's not that many big stones to hide behind so that the frightful Finns walking by wouldn't suspect anything before it's to late and there I would be taking a photo, oh gosh, I could get so deliciously scared faces like The Scream by Edvard Munch and now that I think of it I'm trembling with excitement and can't wait for the next gray day.
Headstone graveyard stalker.
Early spring, when snow no longer covers most of the ground and when all the green leaves and grass is still hiding, the gray and the brown ground is really dull to photograph to someone who likes colors. So I think black and white photography is the only option. Especially if you're going to take photos in the harsh daylight. And after a long, dark winter, who wouldn't want to be outside when the sun is shining brightly.
I've tried black and white photography many times in my photography years but never really liked it that much. I do love striking, beautiful and good black and white photos, but aren't that good in it. Although this time I think I perhaps have figured out something. I've walked around with my camera taking black and white photos for several weeks now, almost every day and haven't gotten tired to it yet. Some of the photos do still look good when I look at them from my camera screen so the hobby is still alive. Sadly the happy feeling in my head usually ends as soon as I look at the photos from a bigger screen. (As I wrote in the beginning of this post about choosing and post process.) But as long as I'm happy photographing, I continue. Sometimes there are photos that I do like and that makes me continue.
More black and white photos here: @jokinmenipieleen/mustavalkovalokuvaukselle-uusi-mahdollisuus
The text is in Finnish but as usual, I don't actually say anything important so just look at the pictures.
The first photo in this post is an abandoned little building in the middle of a small forest in the middle of the city. A forgotten place that now serves as a place for people to leave their temporary mark to the world. As have those done who no longer are living. They may be remembered by someone, their name may be written somewhere, to the history books, to Wikipedia or to their gravestone. But as time passes by, everything changes, turns and wears out.
We all are just shadows wandering the earth. Some short and transparent, some long and dark. Crossing other shadows. But eventually we all just fade away.
