I hope you are all well, healthy and have a great start to your day.
I'm pretty good too and my day starts off pretty busy. Especially in the morning, my workload is a bit high.
I have been thinking about going home for the past few days. After grandma passed away and came back after completing her last rites, I didn't go home anymore. To be honest I don't feel any desire or pull to go home anymore.
An unknown fear or bad feeling is working inside the mind thinking about how it will feel to go home and see that empty house. That's why I'm holding back even though I know I should go home.
This morning I suddenly woke up and I don't know why I thought of home. To be honest, for some unknown reason, the mind is upset. I really want to go somewhere and stay like myself for two days. And there is no place for girls to live on their own, because there are so many responsibilities in a girl's life, her family, children, and everything.
I have been thinking for several days that I will go home and spend two days as myself. Where I don't have to follow anyone's rules, I don't have to work on time, I can be myself, no one will disturb me in any way. Since no one lives in that house at present, no one will tell me anything when I go to that house.
On the contrary, it seems that even if I go to that house, can I live alone? Because I might get suffocated in that empty house. Being on my own, I might be in more trouble.
When I woke up fresh and sat by the window, I was looking outside and thinking, will the girls ever have the freedom to live like themselves?
Before I could find the answer, the alarm of the clock told me that it was time for my work. So I started the family work again. Family means responsibility. And while doing this duty we forget to live ourselves. At one time I realized myself, what did I do for myself?
But the answer is unknown to everyone. It's not that I don't ask myself that question, but like most people, I never have an answer. Sometime upset, frustration surrounds everything. Then I sit quietly and feel upset like myself, I cry when I am in more trouble, then I forget everything and get up and do the family.
