IMAGE IS MINE
One thing that humans are good at is self sabotage. We are so used to looking at someone else's life and counting their blessings that we often miss out on our own milestones.
I used to be the best at talking about how great other people have their life going on for them. I was also best in feeling inadequate and unfortunate. Well, not until one of my friends advised me that if I want to progress in life, I should imbibe the act of gratitude and be grateful. According to him, “if you are not grateful for the little ones, how will the big ones come?"
Well he's right because the moment I became grateful, my life took a new turn and started having positive effects. Again, I didn't even know how far I have come in life until I have someone talk some sense into me while I was depressed.
Now, here's where the self sabotage happened to me; You know it's really funny how I complained of not earning as much. How I cried about working so hard and earning so little.
And, while I felt that my best wasn't good enough, it was still me actively shrinking myself to remain underemployed. I had let people get into my head telling me that advancing for higher degrees and academic qualifications is a waste of time plus money.
I had also believed them when they told me that no employer would want to hire me with my academic qualifications because my renumeration rate will be high and most employers are looking for cheap labour. This made me withdraw from my résumé, all my academic certificates and second degree. I had just my first degree there for academic history and my résumé was really dry. It wasn't until a friend was helping me secure a job position while I was employed that he immediately questioned what happened to all the certificates I had acquired all through the years.
I wondered why he would be asking me such. I mean, does he not know how job applications works for most Nigerian employers? Well I didn't respond till he sent me back my résumé and asked me to send him the updated version. I sent it back again informing him that the résumé was up to date. Immediately, he called me and wanted to be sure that he was dealing with me because that cannot be an updated version of my résumé.
By the time I got done furnishing him with the lies that I have been told, he laughed at me to the point that I was almost in tears. Then he said, "no wonder your life has no improvement. Because no employer will take you seriously with such a skeletal résumé". He got done telling me my life history and then said when I'm ready for growth, I know where to find him. Men! I got really pissed and I had concluded that he never wanted to help me.
It was not until my best friend secured a high paying job that I understood exactly the message I had swept under the carpet. It was also at the perusal of my best friend's résumé that I realised I have clipped my wings all the years.
While coping with the feeling of not being good enough, first thing I did was to change my clique of friends. I got closer to those who did not just share their success stories with me but also carried me along. After I saw hiw rich my best friend's résumé was, I had expressed concerns over mine and she requested to have a look. I sent it to her and of course she laughed at me too. While she laughed, she upgraded it and even went on to be sending me applications for executive job positions.
Aside my bestfriend, I had other friends who was always looking out for me and never failing to help me count my achievements everytime that I doubted myself. They also reminded me of how I had assisted them up the social pyramids most of which I had even forgotten. My family also played their part in boosting my confidence level by always appreciating me.
I started keeping a positive mindset and I had a note of all the nice things friends and loved ones say to me.
Above is my response to the inleo prompt day 24. You can participate here
Moreso, Here is a link to the Cleanplanet biweekly prompt. 
