Disclaimer: This post is not medical advice. If you are in need of medical advice please seek a professional.
Trigger warning: This post covers topics such as medical gaslighting, medical bias etc.
Before we get started I need me some Nurse Jackie cannabis. Cannabis helps me in so many ways. Thanks you cannabis for existing.♥️
First thing's first. The title of this post is not an exaggeration- nor is it the only time that I almost died due to medical incompetence/ doctors not listening. This story is a little long but I feel full context is needed to fully understand.
A little over a year ago I needed emergency dental surgery. I had a root canal as a child that was a shoddy job and my tooth kept getting infected. I lived with this for years (chronic infections for about 15 years off and on). As someone with no health insurance the only treatment I could get before this was anti biotics. Though I needed surgery for a life threatening condition, here in the US if you don't have insurance or the cash to pay out of pocket , they will let you die.
Before you comment "well what about Medicaid?' . As a person with no kids and a job I could never qualify even though I am in fact disabled. Though I am disabled I am not on any form of "disability" benefits either. That is a whole other story. It's a clusterfuck.
I was lucky enough that prior to this surgery I only had a couple of infections over the past few years but myself and my partner decided it was time to get rid of the infected tooth. I am fortunate enough to be in the financial situation where I could afford the surgery with my partner's help.
So we found what we thought was the best oral surgeon (DDS and MD) who was taking patients during covid and offered full sedation. I have POTS and other neurological issues plus TMJD which causes my jaw to randomly slip out of socket -so for this type of surgical extraction I wanted to be unconscious. It is easier for me and the person doing the surgery. Since the tooth already had a root canal they can't just pull it out like a regular tooth. They have to do what is known as a surgical extraction.
Of course x rays were done prior to surgery and there was in fact an infection at the time of surgery. This is important later.
I could tell that the doctor was very judgmental of me and my medical issues. Even though I do not have any psychological disorders (which are valid medical conditions, I just don't suffer from them) there is still a lot of stigma around POTS and my other conditions that coupled with me being female often leads to doctors treating me like shit. He also had some serious narcissistic tendencies.
He did the surgery and did not prescribe me anti -biotics. He said that he was able to dig out all of the infection.
This is scientifically impossible unless his eyes are electron microscopes. Infections can be microscopic and even one cell of infection can spread. It is not possible for anyone, no matter how good you are to simply extract all of an infection.
It is also not standard practice for a doctor to not prescribe anti biotics when there is an active infection. Especially someone who is immune compromised which as someone with an neuro-immune disorder I am very susceptible to infections after surgery even if I didn't have an infection before hand. But hey, I am just a hysterical woman, what do I know?
I was prescribed a mild pain reliever (Tramadol) and was told I was lucky to get that. They told me that they normally do not give out any pain medication after major dental surgery (that itself should be considered malpractice) but since I have a severe NSAID allergy, they made an exception.
I didn't argue though even in my drugged out state mind this didn't feel right.
later that day once the Novocain wore off I was in probably the worst pain of my life- or close to it. Keep in mind I am in pain 24/7 "normally". I also had experience dry sockets in all 4 quadrants and a post op infection when my wisdom teeth were removed (years prior to this, but this is just for reference). Some people describe that pain as the worst pain a person could feel. The pain I was in was worse than 4 dry sockets plus an infection. I know I suffer from central sensitization which means I literally feel pain more intensely than a healthy person but this was not ok.
I ended up calling the after hours number and talked to the doctor. He literally did not listen to me at all. I tried pleaded with him. I was crying and so out of sorts because of the intense pain and infection it was hard to communicate.
My partner witnessed this phone call and was about ready to punch the doctor for how much of an asshole he was. I was in excruciating pain and in the frustrating of it all I needed up yelling at the doctor saying "fuck you" and hung up. Remember this was after I was begging him to listen to me and that I knew something was really wrong.
This was not my finest moment but as someone who used to work a pharmacy where I experienced way worse treatment from patients every day while making minimum wage- I figured he would understand that I was in pain and not myself. I always treated the patients at the pharmacy with respect even when they were cruel and often times threatening towards me. This happened pretty much daily. Surely a surgeon is professional enough to handle that, you would think.
I spend the whole weekend in agony. I also had a low grade fever. My body temperature is naturally about 2 degrees lower than normal. About 96.8 is my normal. this means when I have a 2 or 3 degree fever it only seems like a slight fever if anything when comparing to a normal person and is usually dismissed. It's like if you had a fever of 101 and doctors dismissed it as normal.
We called and scheduled an emergency follow up first thing on Monday morning. This time I brought an RN with me to the appointment. She was furious about the doctor claiming to get all the infection out during the surgery. She asked him about it and he stumbled to answer.
The doctor immediately started giving me a hard time about the F bomb- as if he has never heard this word in his life. He refused to give me an x ray and said it was because if I did have an infection it wouldn't show up for several more days. This is an outright lie. That's not how that works.
He diagnosed me with "muscle spasms" and said that it was impossible for my pain to be spreading beyond where he did the surgery. Another lie. The pain was from the infection spreading you fucking dumbass.
He prescribed me vicodin, but no anti biotic. I also had classic signs of infection like a gross taste in my mouth that didn't go away after brushing or using anti biotic mouth rinses fever, pallor and extreme pain. He told me to come back 4 days later if I am not better and then he'd do the xray.
If I waited the 4 days I would likely be dead. I had a serious infection.
My entire life I have dealt with doctors not believing me, dismissing me because of my gender and my neuro-immune disease and other co morbid chronic illnesses. It's hard enough to exist in this society being disabled, being medically gaslit helps no one.
Needless to say I got a second opinion and the dentist I consulted with was shocked an appalled. He said that I should have been given anti-biotics no question after the surgery even if I wasn't immune compromised.
The second dentist prescribed me oral anti-biotics but told me if I am not getting better after 24-36 hours or if I get worse I need to go to an ER or urgent care center to get IV anti biotics because the infection was so bad.
Luckily that wasn't necessary. I started to slowly feel better because I was actually treated for the condition that I had.
I do feel like I should point out that even though I knew something was terribly wrong, I have been medically gaslit so much in my life I often doubt my own reality. I am constantly asking myself "is it really that bad? Am I really this sick?" I was second guessing myself this entire time and if I didn't have my hubby I wouldn't have gotten the second opinion (for various reasons) and likely would have died or been hospitalized.
I am still considering a malpractice lawsuit but with my chronic illnesses I am just not healthy enough to go through that.
I wanted to tell this story to maybe reach someone who is going through some medical related things and no one believes them Please trust yourself. If something feels wrong, seek help. Seek 2nd, 3rd 4th etc opinions until you find someone who will help you. This may take years, in some cases decades but please keep trying
If you read this whole post, thanks. I need a serious toke break after this and I'll smoke one for you. :)
Though I do not have any diagnosed psychological disorders I do have PTSD like symptoms in regards to medical care and trauma from medical "care". Cannabis helps me with this as well.
Decades of medical gaslighting has horrific effects on people. Doctors who do this should not be practicing medicine.
I will end this saying if you think something is wrong with you medically and no one believes you know this. I believe you. You are valid and worth of being treated with respect.
♥️🦄