Two weeks ago, I finally made it to my old friends’ house outside Bangkok. I haven’t been there for years since I had moved away from my family’s house in the same area. How things have changed drastically over the last ten years. My mother’s house was in this old real estate project which used to be very popular among the Chinese grandparents whose businesses were located in Chinatown. It was an upmarket area for the new middle class some twenty years ago.
I met these friends by coincidence and found out that their families also lived in the same area. Through time, we got to become quite good friends and I dropped by their old house very often. I had to live in city center, at my family’s old townhouse, as my work place was in the city. It would take time to commute between the suburban house to work in the city center. So, I could dropped by my mother’s new house during the weekend and also popped to see how my friends were doing. That was a happy time in my life when things seemed simple and uncomplicated.
Expectations and disappointments finally led to accusations, misunderstandings and bitterness. I was quite puzzled by the efforts of my family to try to control and dictate my life. They wanted me to be one of the team to make money and grow rich quickly. That meant the need to get involved with high society, making connections and doing businesses with other partners. But my mind was too far away from these worldly goals. I was lucky to get a very well paid job with foreign company. So, I could afford to get to the seaside every weekend for my relaxation. My siblings couldn’t understand why I was so lazy and didn’t try to find ways of making extra money with my qualifications.
So, I visited my old friends’ house more often than my own family’s house. I found out that I couldn’t follow my siblings’ conversation during family dinners. They talked too much about money matters and comparisons with others in societies. They had no idea that most of the high society people they wanted to know weee actually my friends’ families. I took the social climbing effort to be useless as people whether rich or poor, all shared the same kinds of sufferings. I wouldn’t entertain close friendships with people whose hearts had no kindness and compassion.
Fortunately, most of my friendships cultivated at college overseas turned out to be very positive and worthy of my life force. My college alumni and friends were mostly from old families with backgrounds connecting to the political changes of the country. So, I was privy to private information recounted to me by those characters who were recorded in our historical archives. This had made me very patriotic and I could put many puzzling pieces together to give me a bigger picture of how lucky our country could preserve its sovereignty in the past.
I could never share my thoughts and opinions with my siblings who were only interested in doing business and making money. They reminded me of some of my friends from Hong Kong in the past. On the other hand my friends whom I got to know by chance just moved into their own house after their marriage the previous year. They needed someone to help them with the health issue with their first baby. So, I went to give them some support. It turned out that the baby eyes were underdeveloped, her retinas stopped growing after three months old. So she was born blind, the doctor told them that the baby wouldn’t be able to see like normal babies. The mother was very distressed and sad, both parents were very guilty and wanted to help their baby to get the best medical help.
They told me they saw all top doctors and specialists in our country. They all made the same conclusions after detailed examination of the baby. My friend told me that it could be because she used to work in her father’ s factory where lots of chemicals were used on the process. She had probably accumulated this kind of chemicals in her body which influenced the growth of her baby’s retinas. She told me that the effect of this chemical was quite well known. So, the parents were full of regrets and sorrow. They did everything they could and spent so much money on medical consultations.
They tried to search for the best and well known specialist overseas. I had to write a letter on their behalf to the best specialist at the eye hospital in London. They couldn’t contact this doctor on their own as he worked with the government’s national Health Service. He didn’t have private practice for client from overseas. So, I had to write a letter appealing for his compassion for the suffering parents and blind baby. After several months, they got a reply and an appointment with a few months’ interval. They did meet this kind doctor who helped them to improve the baby’s ability to see some light in the future. They had to train the baby to use eye patches and eye exercises. To my surprise, the doctor didn’t charge them any fees. They went back to see this doctor twice a year for a few years. The little girl could see some light in one eye later on.
So, I became a frequent visitor at my friends’ house just to keep up with the baby’s improvement. By chance, my brother got married and moved into the house nearby my friends’. Then, I had more excuse to drop by to see my little nieces and nephew, including my friends’s young family during the weekend. Those were good old days of carefree friendships and understanding. I was glad to see those young kids growing up healthy and strong. I used to help them with babysitting very often so the parents could get on with their errands.
After years of absence, all the surrounding areas have become much more developed, all the green wooded areas had been transformed into housing estates. I would have lost my way as the roads and new bypasses have popped up in all directions. The real estate has become older but new residents have turned old houses into very stylish and modern houses. It’s quite a contrast to see the old houses along side modern and progressive houses. I was glad the houses around my friends’ road still remained the same.
Though my friends had renovated their house three years ago, they made a lot of improvements to the house. They had three extra bedrooms and a new garden which was very beautifully designed. They even had a fish pond with amazing big fish. My friends told me to drop by and stay the weekends at their house years ago. But my life was hovering outside the city for several years. I had moved my residence a few times due to family troubles, it took me a few years to settle down properly. Then, other things were thrown into my life to force me to adjust myself and find my own space for the peace of my soul.
My friends and families also went through their lives’ ups and downs. The karmic storms came through to test all people with various upheavals during the last eight years. Just when things seemed to be quiet, the plandemic started to make havoc to all people again. It’s just amazing how resilience most people have shown though I could see scars on their faces. There’s a hint of sadness in their eyes and the insecured feeling of uncertainty in life. I wish things would have been kinder to all of us, but who would have the omnipotence of divine intervention.
I walked around the beautiful garden admiring all the orchids and plants. My friends did have very good builders and designers for such a nice renovation. I couldn’t believe the results of the garden designer. My friend was suddenly became crazy about orchids and cacti. They also had a community vegetable garden among six households. They took turn watering the garden. So, this small community could have organic vegetables throughout the year. They also had lemon trees and several kinds of herbs. I liked the cool corners at the back of their garden around the fish pond. I could sit there with a book for hours.
Inside the house, the hallway seemed a bit more spacious and the sitting room had become a gym. My friends had a treadmill, a stepping machine and a rowing machine. The lady friend has started to do some jogging and weight lifting at my insistence. She has also stopped drinking as I did warn her of becoming an alcoholic. I was quite impressed that she took my words seriously. We had a big lunch at a restaurant with her two sons and her own brother’s family. It was a good opportunity to see old friends again though we couldn’t talk seriously at the dining table. We all got older and put on extra weights! We all promised ourselves to do more exercises.
I was glad to see everyone looking healthy and well. The grownups were concerned about the future events concerning international politics and local economy. The younger generation was more concerned about their career and progress in their career paths. They were smart youngsters with good prospect. One was a film producer while the other was a rising star in top company. I hope and wish that they would do well in the future with all the certainties.
Life is changing all the time as time never stops! So, ‘the show must go on!’ We have to keep on moving like the water flowing in river, the water shouldn’t stay still too long as stagnant water couldn’t be healthy for living beings. I have to do more exercises and walking meditation to calm my mind and to live in the moment. Observing those beautiful orchids in my friends’ garden, I would order two pink orchids for my garden next time!
Wishing you peace, good health and prosperity.
Stay strong and cheerful.