You can feel sad and still be able to give yourself a break. The craziest thing about life is that each of us has our problems spelled out for us. What you are facing might be different from mine, but we can agree that we are all facing something. It's probably best if we sit with ourselves and acknowledge this fact. There's no point looking at your neighbor's grass and wishing you had their lives. There's every tendency that if you had their lives, you wouldn't be able to pull through like they do.
We are built differently, and there is so much we can handle. You shouldn't be caught trying to rain advice for situations you have not been in before. You have no experience whatsoever to advise someone on matters that you haven't directly felt or experienced. It is only the person who wears the shoes that knows where it pinches, they say.
Reality grabs us by the balls, and whether we like it or not, our problems have been shared based on the ones we can handle. And sometimes, we are our own problems. The magnitude of the things that happen to us, if looked into, can be direct karma depending on the choices we made in the past.
You can swear you've lived a good life, but there's one mistake or two you might have made and probably forgotten. But time finds a way to bring them to the surface, digging up skeletons and forcing you to stand face to face with the decisions you made years ago.
No one will tell you, and you might not even remember as you move past life, enjoying and living without a care in the world, but it will come back, and when it does, you will feel you do not deserve everything you are going through.
I won't say you do. But I will say if you ever come to terms with the things you did in the past that are back to hurt you, sit still and ask yourself: if you were given a second chance to go back in time and change that particular decision, would you?
If the answer is no, then heaven bears you witness that you had to do what you had to do. It could have been a survival instinct.
What heaven should not catch you doing is pointing fingers. No. Heaven should not catch you throwing a fit when the results of your actions come back tenfold. You did this; you might as well live with it and accept whatever you get.
No one can tell what the future holds; we can only run on probabilities, picking heads or tails, fingers crossed, waiting to see if we made the right decisions or not. Sometimes we did, and sometimes we didn't, but that's what makes us human.
What we can do differently is not try to blame anyone or sink into depression. The best thing to do is to dust yourself off and try again.
Use every leverage you learned as a result of the past decision to create new paths and walk right into your destiny.
No, it won't be easy. You will struggle because some things won't make sense at first. It won't make it any better.
All I can guarantee you is that at the end of the road, maybe on your deathbed, you will see how all of the puzzles fit into the bigger picture. And if you did the picking up of the pieces right, you will smile to the grave.
And I honestly hope you do.