In the last few months since my father's passing, I have learned many valuable lessons and reflections from this series of experiences. When I write down the word " View ". In this eyeball without feeling closed, I pit my perceptions and experiences on everything.
When sharing honestly about my experience in being the recipient of the reaction. When I feel misunderstood, judged, perceived as justifying or sharing theories, I still feel disappointed, embarrassed, sometimes even angry. However, it turns out that sometimes my heart still reacts.
There was one turning point that finally brought me to this phase, which was when I realized—in fact—that we really can't change anyone. This is not the first time I have come to this understanding. But every time there is a fresh experience that reminds me again, it feels like there is a new depth to living that one reality.
During this time, sometimes we believe that we can change other people's views of us, we believe that with maximum efforts we can make ourselves fully understood, we also believe that the truth that we have—if communicated as well as possible—can become the truth for others. Trust is so common and becomes the grip of almost everyone, that when we enter into a relationship, with anyone and anything, from other humans to God, we assume that we have that control.
However, what we observe from our own experience—and what we can also trace every human being can only go through the intricacies of his own heart. Whatever we reveal can never be fully captured as we want. There will always be filters, delimiters, auto-sorting our stories in other people's heads. On the other hand, there will be additions beyond what was previously filtered.
The reality that we live in is very dependent on the views and twists of the heart that we wear. Reactions are simply layers of perception that we accumulate, assemble, and accumulate through the conditioning, evolutionary processes, and changes we experience throughout life. Our views are very likely to change, in fact, will continue to change. But where lies the control of this change?
We used to understand and accept the condition that the key to change is only in ourselves. I can't change your view, only you can. Vice versa. As long as our views differ, we can only communicate our perceptions, watching how our differences grow and dynamic. Unfortunately, often in real life, we are not satisfied with simply "delivering".
Actually, we don't really care about the truth, we don't even understand what true communication is, we only care about our views. In understanding it "rightly", the goal is no longer right or wrong, but understanding how the two started and how we can be free from the trap of both.
We all want happiness, even eternity. But no matter how perfect the view we adopt, as beautiful as the reality we see, view are just view. The view remains a layer that limits the reality we think and the real truth. As long as we are in the realm of perceiving reality, as long as we depend on the twists and turns of our hearts to uncover the truth, you and I are only exchanging relative truths.
The main point is, both parties learn to understand that if there is a difference of opinion between them, the difference is already there. Not to be equated, matched, or corrected. And what happens is the magic of communication: a deep understanding and connection, even enlightening. Because only through true communication, layer upon layer of our vision can be eroded, and if we are lucky, we are able to peek at glimmers or glimmers of the beautiful truth without sight. The beauty of the heart without the twists of the heart.
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Resource: https://read.cash/@Alther/twists-and-turns-of-the-heart-e339c94b