When I was a teenager, at about every New Year's Eve, we used to get a lot of 'new year, new me' updates on Facebook. Not only that, but we also got a lot of updates of people threatening to cut off those who they have left behind or those who do not contribute anything meaningful towards their life.
Notably, I have had those whom I held dear cut me off, and as I respond to the Hive Learners prompt, I am quickly reminded of a friend I was once close to who is now a complete stranger.
The thing is our friendship has always been rocky with constant quarrels and settlements, but then you see what finally separated us wasn’t a fracas but a realisation that we both walked different paths, and eventually when she met people who walked a similar path as hers, she quietly drifted away, and I respected her decision to just let her be.
But then recently she texted me out of the blues and while i thought we were catching up, she went cold again. I also continued to minding my business. So just as my mom and I were preparing for our end of year trip, my mother sought to know if I would be linking up with this old friend of mine and I told her I will not.
You see, My mother was aware she texted recently and thought that maybe I would extend a hand of friendship to salvage whatever is left but personally my ego proved to be bigger.
While my mother thought it was no big deal reaching out to her and informing her of my visit to her state of residence, I really did thought it best to just let her be.
Technically it would never be me reaching out first but then I am always opened for genuine settlement once I’m being approached with it.
Like the friendship with this my friend that went south, I have since come to terms with the fact that certain level of our life do lead to the termination of certain friendships and it’s perfectly ok. Before I use to feel it’s gutter behavior to cut people off simply because we’ve attained a certain level that they could no longer align but with each lessons life throws at me, I am fast accepting this aspect of life as part of survival.
Really, it took this girl keeping her distance to push me to think big and want greater things. Her actions pushed me out of my comfort zone as I further understood the importance of networking. She has never been one to think small. In fact, while we were still friends, she always aspired for things that seemed far from her reach, and while I wanted her to go slow, she was audacious and kept at the fast lane.
Sometimes I wonder if my life would have been better if I had hopped in the fast lane as she did. I remember her finding me a job in Lagos because she wanted me to settle first there while she came to joins me after her service year as I was a year ahead and had completed mine.
Quite unfortunately, I was too invested in my comfort zone, so I went back home to my parents when the going got tough. Unlike me, she refused to cower as she kept building her network despite not having much of an advantage at the time and today she has overly done well for herself, taking the headlines in mainstream media as one of the top successful entrepreneurs in Nigeria.
As ugly as our friendship turned out, she remains my biggest motivator behind the scenes and a part of me do hope that we would rekindle our friendship one day.