Not too long ago, I was having a conversation with a friend, this was the first time in over a year that we were meeting, and it was quite the meetup. And during the convo, we spoke about our lifestyle. He found introverts weird, and he couldn’t understand how anyone could be okay with being indoors, away from every other person for an extended period of time. According to him, if he’s not around people, he would have to physically go out to look for them.
He went further to say that the only time he’s ever really alone is when he’s sleeping or doing something in his home. Other times, he can't just do it. A lot of things that someone like me enjoys, he would never. He says he can’t sit for two hours to see a movie, he can’t start a series and finish it. He’s a football fan and follows the league and football news. But get this, he can’t watch a football match alone. He always has to go to the viewing center or a friend’s house, where there will be a sort of gathering.
So, in a nutshell, my friend’s life is only livable for him when he is surrounded by people. If he doesn’t have that, then he won’t consider it good enough for him. Maybe this is what works for him, but for someone like me, I just can’t imagine always being surrounded by people. It gets to me eventually. I just love being able to be on my own and get lost in my thoughts. This is not something you can do when you’re always surrounded by people and doing things that don’t encourage critical thinking.
I’m not trying to say that his choices are bad or anything, but I just get a feeling that he’s the kind of person who won’t be able to have a good time if there is no one there to share it with him. For someone like me, I prefer to go to the cinema alone because I hate distractions when I’m watching movies, which is why I would never consider that place as a romantic date venue. However, if I do end up taking someone there, I will first make sure she’s a movie lover like me, so she won’t take it personally when we go two hours into the movie without saying a word to each other. And if she’s not, and we still have to see the movie, I’ll make sure it’s a movie I’m not really interested in. That way, I won’t ruin anything for myself.
I’ve just always been the kind of person who found it easy to have fun and be happy by myself. I have good friends, and I know how to have fun with them, which I do from time to time. But I will never be the kind of person who, if my friends are not around, I will be bored and not know what to do. If all my friends and family went abroad and left only me in Nigeria, I would miss them, but I wouldn’t be bored. I’ve learned to derive pleasure and meaning in my own company.
This is why, whether I’m in a crowd or on my own, I always know how to be happy. I believe that if you’ve learned to find happiness in yourself, then it won’t matter if people are in your life or not, you’ll be able to keep sailing regardless. Because in truth, while happiness is intentional, it’s also free. We’re the ones who decide the price we have to pay for it.
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