My childhood is easily one that I enjoyed greatly, and the way I see it, it was one I was privileged to have because I know all the ways things would have gone wrong and life would have turned out differently. I was blessed to have loving parents who did their very best to give us the basics of life, and that is something I will always be grateful for.
But then, even childhood was not always peaches and roses. There were a lot of things that happened back then, that I will not allow to happen to my child in this day and age. And there are things that should have happened but were denied me. I am not a parent yet, but once I am given that mandate, there will be an update to the parenthood my own parents showed me.
Social
I will encourage my children to socialize more, and this will be not just on social media. But physical relationships as well. I will make sure they have friends of their age in the neighborhood and they play together regularly.
As a child, even though my siblings and I had friends in my neighborhood, we were rarely allowed to play with them. We were always indoors and over time that caused us to be introverts. We learned to find more comfort inside the house than outside. And this character followed us into adulthood.
One reason I will push for this is that children are supposed to go through all the stages. There is the stage when they should be free to play, run around and fall down. There should be a stage when they hurt their knee or wound themselves. These are part of the things that help build strong members of society. Right from the playground, you will know people who are destined to be leaders, followers, and criminals.
So, I will encourage my children to make friends and play. Although I will make sure it is kept to moderation. But it will never be lacking, I’ll make sure of that.
Comparison!
This is another thing I would never do with my child. And that is to compare them with other children their age. Our parents did it a lot to us and the effects it had on our minds then…
I know they did it out of love, trying to get us to buckle up and get the job done. But there are other ways to encourage a child and get them to perform. So phrases like;
“You got only 7 marks, what did Steven get?”
“Anna that won the competition, does she have 2 heads?”
All of them would have to disappear from my vocabulary. I would not compare them with either their peers or anyone for that matter. Because that is the same way I would not like to be compared to my peers who seem to be making it better than myself. If I won’t like it, why subject my child to it? Such things mess with their self-esteem and self-confidence.
Not Just Academics!
We were raised with the idea that school was the Alpha and Omega of our existence, and we were going to die if we didn’t go to school or even failed in school. Unfortunately, we went to the school and our eyes opened. We were supposed to finish schooling and return to jobs, but we finished schooling and returned to continue living with our parents. And in the end, many of us had to learn skills.
For my children, academics will not be so hyped at all. Especially Higher Education. They will get basic education, of course, that is their right. But once they are done with SS3, they get to choose the next path they would want to go. Do they want to go to the university or learn a skill? Even if they want to go to a music school or football academy, I will support them wholeheartedly.
After all, a lot of us these days are making a living from something totally different from what we studied in school. I believe that if only students who want to go to school actually go there, we would not have so much distraction and corrupt practices going on there. So, going to the university will be a choice.
My dear friends, there are so many things I will do when my child is concerned. But then, as they say, easier said than done. As I have grown and become an adult, I have come to understand a lot of things more clearly. Our parents raised us as they knew best during their times, and it worked for us. We too would have to raise our children in line with these times. Trying to use the same methods our parents used might not work so well considering how different things are.
Anyway, in the end, it all boils down to the individual parent and the plans they have for their children. That will be the deciding factor that will shape the child’s life.
