Hello There
I believe this is the first time I make a post in Hive Learner community. I just joined this community recently because I saw many of familiar hivians there. So in this post I am sharing my experience in the first quartal of 2025.
Before I start, let me share an old story between my grand father and me. I was a shut in kid. During that time I was known as a lonely weird kid, while nowadays kids like me called as having autism. I played with cats and goats, and humans were creatures that I disliked to interact with.
One day, when I visited my grand parent house, we had this big whole family gathering there. My grand parent had 8 kids, and everyone brought their children. So there was like a kindergarten there from my grand father point of view.
Except one kid, who could not blend well, even tend to not talking to others. Yup that's me. I even got fight with my cousins, she threw food and I punched her LoL. Somehow currently we become well closed now after we get older.
Ok back to that time, I got a fight with cousin, all my cousins thought I was a weirdo and they alienated me because they did not know what to do to me. So while I was playing alone with chicken, my grand father came to me.
He said he did not know how to start a proper conversation to me, because he knew I did not speak and hear as the others. He tried to consoled me but I kept ignoring him. However I remembered he said this to me these words.
"Sometime everything just go wrong even you have given your best. Sometime you have enough but bad things keep coming in. And during that time, maybe you have enough with everyone, because everything keep getting wrong. so I could only say this. It is Ok not to be Ok, don't blame yourself and keep do what you think you should do"
Then he left me in the yard playing with chicken.
THE FIRST Q1 of 2025
2025 started in a very bad way for me. One of my partner had a bad luck, his family got accident and he could not pay for the medication. Not all people here covered with insurance, even they do, not all accident insurance will cover. So there is a hole there and shit thing happens!
This condition forced me to start taking HIVE out from this wallet, into fiat. Just to help him pay the bill.
Later in January 2025, when my family was supposed to celebrate a Chinese New Year, I had to let go my father. Heaven called him and I walked him there. From the night he lost consciousness, I called an ambulance car, we got him into hospital, doctor said it was hopeless, I called all families I knew, and last at his next, we signed the paper and all his life supports stopped. I still remembered well when his ECG monitor showed the straight line after line support got stopped.
I made a post later here
@dewabrata/taco-tuesdays-the-most-sorrowful-yellow-rice-jac
and that was the last run of my Taco Tuesday in FreeCompliments community.
Did that end the bad thing in the first quarter? of course not, not even close. February and March were not less bad. I had client failed to pay, they even expressed their incapacity to pay my invoices. I really did not know how to treat this guy, because a person should be ashamed when they could not pay their responsibility after we had delivered our service, but not these guys.
So like it or not, I got no money and I could not pay my vendors and workers too. So the whole months, people phoned me, texted me and all their messages were about cursing me and saying bad things on me. Well it's my mistake to not to be able to pay them, but that's what bound to happen if your biggest clients somehow changed to some asses.
In the end, as you can see in my #saturdaysavers post, I ended the first quarter 2025 with 0 savings
IT IS OK NOT TO BE OK
Nothing worked in the first quartal of 2025. Everything was wrong. Do I feel disheartened? It is a lie if I say I never feel that. There were times there that I felt enough with everything. There were times that I even questioned everything about the whole thing.
I know I am not alone in this all bad things. Some people here on HIVE had the same issue, which misfortune, sadness and sorrow lingered in their days.
For those people who were having a good three months there, I am happy for you. For those who are so so in the middle, don't give up... let's pray for a better one.
And for those who are like me, we were not good at all... I can only say this
Sometime It Is OK Not To Be OK
Let's keep moving on, shall we? I won't say cheer up or anything, I am bad at it, but don't blame anything for any bad we have now.
Actually I have participated in all LPUD this year. It looks like only LEO journey which has been ok for me this year. at least there is something good in this sea of bad things.
LPUD AND APUD
hahaha, I know this is so random but this is what I do to cheer up myself. I like to do POWER UP DAY, because it is encouraging people to stay longer on HIVE and be more active. Let's do the first one
LPUD
I just made 151 LEO POWERUP/staking LEO token as my participation in LPUD (LEO POWER UP DAY)
this is my hash: https://he.dtools.dev/tx/129f336972c9c0203a4cdad8bf48d47c614c5031
Alive Powering Up
I just made 21 ALIVE POWER UP. There is no Alive Power Up Day, but we have this Tuesday Alive Staking as part of 
this is my hash: https://he.dtools.dev/tx/1f796335c048c4bfeb416541f0ed941d2635bc7a
I have 6.785 AP (Alive Power) Right now, I am already in top 30 AP richlist, I do not know whether I should aim higher or not, but I will keep my participation in Alive Community events.
Thank you for coming and reading my post. I live in Jakarta, Ex-Capital City of Indonesia. Currently I am running a small business with less than 10 people. I used to live by making money online, that's why I like being here, on HIVE, and in PIMP - (Paper In My Pocket) community.
