Raising children has always been a delicate balance between guidance and freedom. One of the most debated aspects of parenting today is the issue of kids and privacy. At what point should a parent shift from the “open-door” policy, where everything is supervised, to allowing a child their own space? Privacy can be seen as a sign of trust, a way of helping kids build independence and responsibility. Yet, too much freedom too soon may expose them to risks, while being overly invasive can strain the parent-child relationship. Finding the right balance is not only a question of parenting style but also a reflection of the values we want to instill in our children.
Before I dive deeper into the topic, there is one of my favorite bible verses I would like to share with you, which will be the foundation of what I will be sharing with you. I am not going to make this blog religious, but this scripture verse will help me explain better how parenting works and when a child can have the privacy they need.
Proverbs 22:6
6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
From this scripture verse, one of the most important things I would like to pick from it is the "Train a child in the way he should go"
That's the first part I will be using, every child out there is born with love for their parent because the parents are the ones they have always seen providing everything they need. A child will always obey a parent who loves them and does everything they need, and this is when the parent needs to start training the child.
"Hey dear, can you leave your door open, so I can always come check on you when you are sleeping, please?"
Saying this to a child, who is now conscious of their environment, will make them feel respected, and since they love their parent and they know there is no way the parent would harm them, they would do that. The parent can even make it a law, and every one of their child will follow the rule.
I remember when growing up, it was a rule that we all waited for every one of our siblings to be around before we ate. There was also another law that we ate from the same place, and it was prohibited to lock your room door.
These are laws set by my parent because they want to help us grow better. When my sister was 18, she was given her room, and everyone was gathered. My dad said, there are some things she can do alone now, like eating alone, staying in her room, and closing the door. She got a phone, and this made all of us follow the rules strictly because she followed them, and she has gotten the reward of following these rules.
The next line that follows that verse says "When he is old, he will not depart from it"
Training your child and instilling discipline in them should give the parent some kind of trust in their child(ren). Since much they know what the child is capable of and they have trust in their own training, there is no reason not to give their child(ren) the privacy the child deserves.
This is where the true beauty of parenting comes in. If you train your child well in love, discipline, and respect, then you can trust them when the time comes to give them privacy. Their actions will reflect their upbringing. Privacy should not be seen as losing control of your child; it should be seen as a gift of trust that they have earned through your guidance.
In conclusion, modesty in granting privacy to kids lies in timing and training. Give too much too soon, and you risk losing them. Hold back too long, and you risk suffocating them. But if you balance love, discipline, and respect, you will find the right moment to loosen the reins. This is my belief.
Thanks for reading. My name is Fashtioluwa. Image used is mine.
