When we talk about lies, most people quickly think about those big, bold, and obvious untruths. But sometimes, the most dangerous lies are not the ones spoken but the ones left unsaid. The lie of omission is one of those subtle ways people bend reality, choosing not to tell the whole truth and allowing others to believe what they want them to think. It might look harmless on the surface, but when you dig deeper, you begin to see how damaging it can be.
What is a lie of omission? In a simple definition, it means
A lie of omission is when someone doesn’t tell the full truth or leaves out important information so that the other person ends up with a wrong or incomplete picture.
It’s not the same as telling a direct lie with words, but it’s still misleading because the person is intentionally hiding something that matters.
There are different ways we can look at a lie of omission, but I will be discussing this topic with a relationship as a case study. People who know me well know that I love to talk about relationships and how to make them work, even if it's a distant relationship or a close one.
Do you know that what leads to much distrust in relationships in today's world is "a lie of omission"? Some people see it as a normal thing not to give full information to their partner, and when they find out, they would say,
But I told you.
Yes, you said something to him or her, but you never gave the full information. Let's take, for example, a guy and a lady are dating. now the guy knows you have many friends, both male and female, then there is an outing, and this is the way you inform him.
Hey, babe, I will be going out with my friends tonight.
That's the truth, but when you want to give that information in a good way and not hide anything from him, without him asking this and this making it look like he is feeling insecure, the lady can say
Hey, babe, I am going out with 4 of my friends tonight. James, John, Drake, and Brad. We are going to the cinema, and so and so and so will be around too.
Hold up, you see how the two statements are different. This way, he knows what's going on and when he sees pictures online, he won't feel bad or something.
Ok, here is another example. Your girlfriend knows you have a female friend, and this female friend knows your girlfriend. Now, she wants to come visit and you need to let her know. The only thing the guy said was "Dorcas will be coming over for a visit," but you refuse to add the information of "She will be sleeping over."
Yes, she came for a visit but don't you think the guy has also lied to his girlfriend by omitting some of the most important information so the girlfriend can make a better decision? Leaving out some part of the truth and allowing people to make a decision based on the little they know is also a lie of omission. Another example is
- If you spend money recklessly but only tell your partner about the “necessary” expenses, you’re hiding the truth by omission.
You see, lying by omission is often considered just as dangerous (or even worse) than an outright lie because the person can always defend themselves by saying, “But I didn’t lie; I just didn’t mention it.”
In the end, trust is built on openness, not half-truths. A lie of omission may seem small, but its ripple effect can cause cracks that weaken even the strongest bonds. Whether in relationships, friendships, or any other part of life, leaving out important details is still a form of dishonesty. If we truly value the people we care about, then honesty should be complete, not selective. Always remember, what you don’t say can hurt just as much as what you do say.
Thanks for reading. My name is Fashtioluwa.
Thumbnail image is mine.
