Though I am a very calm guy, I used to think that I was way calmer than this, not until something small began putting me off. Though they were not a big deal like that. Just some little impatience, most especially when I am in a hurry and something or someone is trying to delay me, or when I am working and NEPA decides to take off the light, most especially during this heat period. I would not show it on the spot, but I will be feeling it heating inside of me like a pot of boiling water that is covered up.
When I was little, something I usually feared and ran away from was anger due to the family I came from and all those Bible teachings that anger is not good. Back at home, in school, and in church, even on the street, I was unable to talk back; I just took it like that and moved on. So that even taught me how to remain calm always, even when everything seems not to be fine. And like I said earlier, during the Bible teaching and Sunday school in those days, our children's teachers would always emphasize how to always run away from anger and to always remain slow to it. Though those teaching were really helpful, it is not always that I followed it.
Though these days, I still abide by some of those teachings, and what I have noticed is that when someone does me wrong, rather than calling them to it or exploding, I always withdraw myself from such a person, though their actions might affect the way I look at them, speak to them, but I give them that distance, and I tend to think about the whole situation over again.
I have heard people tell me that I should always tell them and flow along with them, but deep inside me, I know that humans will always be human because if I stay close to them, they will always repeat those actions and say that he will not get angry with us; he will just look away after we have told him sorry. But for me, it's better I keep my distance to not get angry over and over again just because of little things.
I don't easily get angry, and if I do, in a few minutes or hours, I have gotten over it because I don't like to always move around with a burden that will keep affecting my actions and decisions. Though I am not perfect, that is why I always give myself the space that I need to breathe until what I am feeling drops and dies down naturally, because if I allow anger to take over, it might lead to another thing entirely.
Though I am still learning, I will continue to learn things that work for me best because there is no way someone will not get angry over some things, but I am trying to understand and not allow it to weigh me down. Even Jesus got angry and flogged those people who came to sell at the temple. As humans, it is natural we get angry, but it is another thing to always control our anger.
Thank you for reading.
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