Having a child is something beautiful and worth giving time to as the amount of time you invest into being with your child goes a long way in determining the bond and relationship you’d develop with them. Children are a product of two individuals and it should be a responsibility of both of these individuals to bring them up except in cases where there are unfortunate occurrences. As a mother of a child, it’s already a natural responsibility for you to spend more time with your child but as a father, most times, their responsibilities towards their family as regards spending time with them are easily swept under the carpet.
Especially in African cultures, it’s a norm for a man to be more concerned about bringing the basic necessities to his family than for him to spend time with them. I mean, yes, as a man you should be able to provide for your family but sadly, most of our men are only concerned about providing financially and little of every other supports (emotionally, physically, spiritually, morally and what have you). Well, this is so because in Nigeria specifically, when a lady gives birth, the mother of either the father or mother will come stay at the house with the new mother to assist in taking care of the child and at this point, most fathers don’t really see the need of been around their child.
Also, another reason why they might not see the need to spend more time with their family is because they have cultivated the wrong mindsets from their environment or even from their parents. Some fathers never saw their own fathers stay behind to help their mother take care of their children so they automatically just thought it won’t be necessary to do the same. It’s only in some cases that some men get to do the opposite thanks to formal education.
So if you ask me, I do think it’s necessary for a father to spend time with his child but not necessarily as much as the mother does but it should be in his plan to spend time with his family. He should on his own make out time when he would volunteer to do some certain chores at home with his wife especially when his mother or mother in law has gone back home. He should dedicate his time to also training his child in the way he wants him to grow so when he is old he would remain in that path.
I don’t think any company or organization especially here in my country will want to agree to give fathers leave from work when their wives gives birth but then, as a father, you are to know you need that time to be with your family and that is why you have to be fully ready for parenthood before you get into it, it’s not just the responsibility of your wife, it’s for both of you first and then others. Bonding with your child at a young age is just the best and you will get to realize that if you can spend more time with them.
Weekend is always a great time to be with family, so if as a man you have a very tight schedule at work, at the point when your wife is pregnant to when she gives birth, you should always try to spend the weekend with them at least and if possible do better if you can. What really matters to me is what a father thinks, for some companies that might give this leave to fathers, you might get to realize that some fathers won’t appreciate it because they don’t see any need spending time with their families. So, I think we should be more concerned about encouraging fathers to have the mindset of spending time with their families.
This is my personal opinion on the topic ”PATERNAL LEAVE”.