Forgiveness is a great virtue, and it can help us to maintain inner peace. Almost in every religion, the matter of forgiveness is discussed, and it is said to forgive others. It's a great act, and if we forgive others' mistakes, the Almighty may forgive our sins also. I don't doubt the teaching of religion, and it is indeed a great thing, and it was said for maintaining peace.
I heard many times that we should forgive others, at least for the sake of religion. And this statement makes me angry because people did not understand the true meaning of forgiveness. As well as I know, there are some cases for which God will not forgive the sinners. It says that the kind of mistake one has made, and depending on it, forgiveness should be measured. The true purpose of religion is maintaining peace, not shielding the sinners. So when someone tells me to forgive for the sake of religion, it's a totally ridiculous thing, and in that case, the sinners or the people with ill thoughts are using the religion for their own interest as a shield when they are not remorseful for their actions. Some people talk about forgiving others like they were angels who came from heaven. I want to ask them, who are they to suggest I forgive others? Unfortunately, sometimes some of my close relatives said the same to me, and I just asked them what the benefit was of my forgiving a certain person. They told me that it's a great act and God will give me a blessing for it. In reply, I just told them I don't want to be a good person, and I want to be a bad person. And that thing kept their mouth closed. You must be thinking I am a cruel person. That's not like that.
Normally, I am an easygoing person, and if anyone makes any kind of mistake, it doesn't matter if it's intentional or unintentional; I don't care too much about it, and that means, for most cases, I forgive others easily. It's because I think I have limited energy and time, and I don't have the time or energy for thinking about others, even if they try to hurt me. I think those people who hurt me unintentionally deserve forgiveness. I am ready to forgive them even if they don't ask for it because I am good at understanding others. But if it's a choice or hurting me was intentional, I don't think they deserve any forgiveness. They have done something intentionally, and they must be responsible for it. Why will I make them free from their sin? Some people say that giving to others makes us free and helps to maintain inner peace.
This is the most ridiculous thought because I think most of the people don't know what inner peace is. Inner peace gives one satisfaction, and in my case, I will feel good and satisfied if the person who hurt me has a tough life and becomes a failure in life again and again. I want to see him living a life like he is in hell. What's there to be feeling sad for? I think that person deserves it, and the troublesome life of him will make me satisfied for sure, and that is called inner peace. For me, I am quite sure that I won't make any manual approach to make his life like that because I think I don't have any intention to take revenge that costs my effort and time. Even I won't feel sad if he lives a good life, but I'll be happy for sure if he leaves the life of hell. As I don't have any thoughts of taking revenge on anyone, in that case my inner peace will not be disturbed. Does it mean I forgive that person? I don't know, as I will not have any intention to take revenge, and I don't think too much about the incident, but again, his suffering life will give me satisfaction. It's complicated to answer.
But I must say that if anyone has the plan to take revenge and make a manual approach for it, it's not a good thing because it will disrupt the peace of mind. I must tell them to forgive, as it will disrupt the inner peace and bring self-destruction. One should not be blinded by revenge. In that case, I recommend him to forgive for his own sake, but I think it's nearly impossible because if one person can forgive, he may not hold a grudge for a long time. It means he can't let it go.
In case of forgetting, I think it is impossible. How can one forget about the incident of being hurt by others unless the person has memory loss issues? Even if there is an option, I think it will be foolishness to choose it. Our past gives us the lesson, and those people who hurt us must be remembered if we don't want to be hurt by them again. If we forget about them, it's like we are going to repeat the same mistake again. There is no way one should be trusted twice after betrayal.
Every situation is different, and whatever I said is based on the average kind of situation we face. I may act differently if the situation is different.
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