Strange but true, many of life's problems are a result of our social environment, the friends and family. Oftentimes, we as individual entities may not engage in ventures that would bring a strain on our thoughts, health, finances, or even life. Many problems encountered are because entities other than us have those troubles. I remember telling a friend that problems would continue to exist even after we were all extinct. Thus, I believe in sieving the problems of life and solving those within the capacity of salvation, especially when it won't be a strain either on our health or even our comfort.
Selfish it may sound, but, for the sake of sanity and peace of mind, I have adopted this code as one of the few that I love by. The world is a noisy place, and we are likely to drown if we keep everything around us to heart. Beyond having access to some information that may not necessarily concern us, some of it could be brought to our doorsteps. Many issues that end up troubling our hearts really do not concern us. People who seek help tend to make you feel you are the only solution to their problems, but what you should remind yourself is that no man is an island, and people who need help may have asked several others. So, why beat yourself unnecessarily? This does not translate to shutting our doors or hearts to helping others, but picking the battles that would not harm us.
My principle has been simple: does the document concern me? Or does the conversation relate to me? I found out that knowing too much is trouble. I have to create a space in my busy schedule of life to store information that would not be relevant to me or is gossip that would probably add my name to the train of gossip.
This does not mean I do not get access to information that does not concern me. There is information that reaches me without me asking for it. However, once I realize such information does not concern me directly or even indirectly, I cut myself out from continuing with being a party to such. This has translated to fewer friends for me and maybe a boring life, but this has had some relatively advantageous impacts on me.
I am likely not to be bamboozled by emergencies, and in fact, I work at my pace. This for me means I have to screen assignments, events, and many other works as they face me. I weigh how important I am to such and vice versa, and in fact, how much discomfort engaging in such would cost me. Thus, I am likely not to start at all or give a support that would not discomfort me significantly.
In addition, my life gets simpler and more focused on personal growth and development. You can't pressure me into accepting matters in a rush. I take my time to weigh both the short- and long-term effects of my actions and inactions.
Having a small and focused circle has been impactful largely because I get more goal-oriented than solving other people's problems.
So, if you get into an argument or a fight and expect me to come to your rescue, you are likely to continue the argument or keep fighting with the other party till both parties get tired. Well, that's probably because it's my code not to get into fights, arguments, or gossip, especially when such do not concern me. The less I know or am involved, the more I get to keep my sanity intact, and the fewer troubling concerns knock on my door.
Thank you for reading. I would love to have your comments and contributions.