African culture and tradition have, over the years long before westernization, attributed wealth to the number of wives a man has. A man is considered responsible when he is married and comfortable in his marriage. The man is preferentially given roles in society when he is married, as it is assumed he is able to manage his family (the nucleus) and can be entrusted with the responsibility of a larger society.
Unfortunately, the tides have changed as westernization has crept into the dwelling of man, gradually effacing the affluence of abundance of land resources to cultivate and indirectly limiting the testosterone urge of man to have more than a wife. More families now have a monogamous marriage where it is just the man, his wife, and his kids. The man is still considered the head of the home and has the responsibility, even when not spelled out, to provide for his family—his wife and children.
Man thus goes through the unimaginable in an attempt to provide for his family, not minding the consequences of some of his actions and inactions. Part of what society bestows on a man is the ability to respond to challenges without voicing out his pains and troubles. A man is expected to put a smile on his face and brave the storm. And unfortunately, many men, rather than sharing with their wives, have imbibed the notion of nurturing their troubles, wants, and desires for themselves like super heroes. Perhaps the reason why men's average life continually drops and women are considered to live longer than men
Whoever invented the notion that man should bottle up his troubles and man it up is definitely doing more harm than good. Though abstractly coined and accepted as a norm, men should be encouraged to speak out instead. It is admirable and laudable to act like a super hero, but men should know their limits and share their worries. Perhaps the saying that a problem shared is half solved, especially if with the right person, is true. No man should have his health and life compromised all in the name of being a super hero for his family, even though the intention is noble.
I hope someday soon men can speak of their thoughts or perhaps pen them down, just like #hive has provided the platform to hear our thoughts on paper. A man's mind is a vastness of erratic thoughts constantly colliding and unsettling.
Thank you for reading. I would love to have your comments and contributions.